


Just You, Just Me

by MarcyGoomen



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: F/M, Post-Endgame, Relationship(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-15
Updated: 2014-07-15
Packaged: 2018-02-08 22:57:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 42,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1959309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarcyGoomen/pseuds/MarcyGoomen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[Post-Endgame] Janeway and Chakotay make amends in the Alpha Quadrant. Story spans several months into their relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was my first fanfic I published in December 2013 on another site. It's rather fluffy at times and I honestly don't even know where half of these ideas came from. I lovingly wrote this for my buddy intrepidclass as a Christmas gift. I don't think I would have written fanfic otherwise. She provided me with many suggestions/inspiration and pointed out typos and what not. However, any other errors are mine.
> 
> Most of this fanfic is rated T, except for chapter 9 and some minor parts in the following chapters.
> 
> As for dates, I used a guide from trekguide. According to them, Voyager arrived in the Alpha Quadrant May 2378. The dates aren't really important, honestly. Just go with it. :D

**Just You, Just Me**

**December 2379**

A chilly breeze caressed Chakotay's face as he sat on the patio of his backyard. It felt wonderful against his skin, even if it was rather cold. After all those years breathing recycled air on  _Voyager_ , Chakotay no longer took those simple things for granted and made an effort to enjoy the minor aspects of life.

It was Christmas Eve and a lot of former  _Voyager_  crewmembers had gathered to celebrate the occasion. It was the second Christmas holiday since their unexpected return to the Alpha Quadrant. Most of the crew had new assignments within Starfleet, or at the Academy, and some were working on independent projects, but no matter what they were currently doing with their lives, they had managed to make time to gather on this cool, yet sunny, afternoon.

Chakotay casually observed his surroundings as he sat away from most of the excitement. There was a time, while still on  _Voyager,_  he felt they were never going to make it back to Earth. Every time the ship endured an attack, either from the Kazon, the Hirogen, or the Borg, Chakotay felt their end was near. Those weren't the ideal thoughts to have as a First Officer, but there were times when optimism was hard to come by. However, he was always glad he had Kathryn's friendship throughout their voyage. They kept each other balanced and in control. They had been a perfect match from the get-go, even if they had some stumbles along the way.

Chakotay took a deep breath and closed his eyes. There was a time he was certain he would never have Kathryn's friendship again. He was sure their return to Earth was the end of their camaraderie. He pushed those troubled thoughts away as soon as they began to sneak into his mind. He didn't need to have negative feelings creeping around on this joyous day.

As he reopened his eyes he noticed Kathryn observing him from a distance. She looked stunning. He smiled at her and she returned the gesture. She was standing in the yard while having a conversation with B'Elanna. But from Chakotay's perspective, it didn't seem as if B'Elanna was even aware of Kathryn's distraction, since she was pretty distracted herself. Miral, who was now over a year and half old, was pulling her mother's arm in the opposite direction. B'Elanna was trying to keep the toddler from hoisting her away. She eventually gave up and let go of the child's hand. Chakotay couldn't help but chuckle as he watched Miral clumsily run toward her father and grab onto his leg. Tom, who was talking to Harry and Michael Ayala, looked startled at first, but picked the little girl up and cradled her in his arms.

Chakotay continued glancing around from one group of people to the next. The Doctor was talking to Reg Barclay. Reg wasn't exactly a former member of  _Voyager,_  but the crew had given him the title of honorary member. He was somewhat responsible for their arrival home anyhow. Tal Celes and Billy Telfer were gazing in each other's eyes and whispering to one another while laughing. The young couple looked quite content, Chakotay noticed. Dalby and Chell were having some sort of intense conversation because there were very drastic hand gestures being thrown about. Chell was always such a…distinct character, he noted.

Chakotay finally returned his gaze toward Kathryn. He couldn't help but think how lucky he was to have her in his life. He was happy. They were happy. Everything he had ever wanted had now been realized. There were days he honestly thought it was all a dream. Like the time they had trapped inside the telepathic pitcher plant. He would always shake those memories quickly away.  _Not even that entity could get it this perfect_ , he thought.

As Chakotay continued to let his mind wander, he couldn't help but let his thoughts travel to the moment they returned to Earth. So much had happened in the months since then. So many things could have occurred differently. If they had, he was certain his life would not be as perfect as it currently was.


	2. Chapter 2

**2378**

Once  _Voyager_  arrived unexpectedly in the Alpha Quadrant, everything changed for Chakotay. The friendship he had with Kathryn, which was already strained, became more so when his relationship with Seven came to light. However, their relationship didn't last long. They mutually agreed to go their own ways only three weeks after setting foot on Earth. Chakotay wasn't upset by the separation. Deep down he knew there was no merit to their association. He would never have regretted what he had with Seven if it had not caused a greater shift between Kathryn and him.

Since their return to the Alpha Quadrant, Starfleet had pardoned all Maquis and granted all  _Voyager_  officers a leave of absence to reacquaint themselves with their new lives on Earth. During this time they were to decide whether they wanted to continue their alliance with Starfleet or if they wanted to pursue other endeavors. Chakotay was unsure what he wanted to do with his life.

Chakotay felt Kathryn was no longer a person he felt he could confide in. Their friendship was not like before. Since her promotion to Admiral, he figured she would not have the time for his problems. At least that's what he thought to convince himself. He decided it was time to visit his family on Trebus and gain a better perspective on things. Five weeks after their return, he left on a transport ship to Trebus without ever saying good-bye to Kathryn.

He wasn't actually running away from his problems, as many, well mostly B'Elanna, had referred to his actions, he merely needed time to figure out his current situation. He had been offered the captaincy of his own ship as well as a teaching position in the Anthropology Department at Starfleet Academy. Both were appealing offers, but he just needed time to choose the right one. Or possibly decline both.

Chakotay spent a little over two months on Trebus. He swam in the lake, went on hikes, and spent time on his carvings. However, he spent most of his time reacquainting himself with his sister Sekaya and getting to know her husband. He also got to meet his nephew, who had just turned 5. He had missed his sister terribly. He also regretted missing so many years of his nephew's life but, in all honestly, would not have traded those seven years in the DQ because that meant he would have never met Kathryn.

_Kathryn_.

Kathryn was always on the back of his mind.  _Always_. He missed her. He missed her more than he thought possible. From spending everyday together for seven years, to not seeing each other for months, it was a great change. A hard change. A change he didn't like. They hadn't spoken since he left Earth. He was certain she knew where he was because of B'Elanna. The last, brief conversation he had with her occurred right after the end of their debriefings, just one week before he had left. Even before then, they had only spoken a handful of times. Their friendship had definitely changed for the worse.

Chakotay knew he has caused her pain by entangling himself with Seven. The extent of the pain was hard to tell since the great Captain Kathryn Janeway always had a marvelous way of hiding her feelings. She had perfected her captain's façade a tad too well sometimes. But he knew deep down she was hurt and he was ashamed of his actions.

Chakotay decided it was time to return to Earth. There were many things that needed to be taken care of. He had to inform Starfleet Headquarters and Starfleet Academy of his final decision. But his main concern was Kathryn. He had thought long and hard about his pending professional future, but not as much as he had thought about his future with Kathryn. He needed her back in his life. Even if a relationship with her was no longer feasible, he at least wanted to maintain their friendship, or at least restore it to the way it was at the beginning of their journey. He wanted to correct what he had done wrong. With those final thoughts, Chakotay began his journey back to Earth.

 


	3. Chapter 3

**August 2378**

Chakotay walked through the courtyard of Starfleet Headquarters on this rather busy morning. He couldn't help but remember how a little over ten years ago he marched the same path to inform Starfleet of his resignation.  _How things have drastically changed in that span of time._ He was no longer viewed as an outlaw from Starfleet's perspective; he was viewed as a respected and valuable officer.

He had arrived in San Francisco just five days prior. He had found a place to live, not too far away from Headquarters. In the five days he had been in the city, he had not contacted Kathryn. He had thought of getting in touch with her the first minute he arrived, but decided he would rather speak to her in person. Since he would be at Headquarters in a couple days, he figured he could just wait until then to surprise her.

Chakotay entered the main building and headed toward the turbolifts. If his memory served him correctly, all admirals had offices in this exact building. He wondered where Kathryn's office might be. He was about to ask the computer for her office location when it dawned on him, she might not even be at Headquarters today. He had just assumed she would be. He did know she had already returned to work when B'Elanna casually informed him when they had talked a couple days before.

As he waited for a turbolift Chakotay asked, "Computer, is Admiral Janeway at Headquarters today?"

"Affirmative," replied the monotone female voice.

Chakotay felt a weight lift from his chest that had only settled there a minute before.

"Computer, where is the location of Admiral Janeway's office?"

"Admiral Janeway's office is located on the west wing of the sixth floor."

Chakotay smiled. Only a small distance separated the two of them now. He hadn't felt nervous at all until this moment. The turbolift finally arrived and he stepped inside. "Fourth floor," he requested. Before he could finally see Kathryn he needed to speak with Admiral Hayes. The journey to his destination was brief. Before he knew it, he was standing in a brightly lit lobby which contained various chairs, couches, and a couple tables with some view screens on the walls. There were two fairly wide corridors, one leading to the left and the other to the right. Each corridor was lined with doors. He found Admiral Hayes office and entered.

The Admiral's assistant told Chakotay to take a seat and the Admiral would be with him shortly. As Chakotay waited, he let his mind roam. He wondered what Kathryn was doing at this very moment.  _She's probably drinking her third cup of coffee of the day_. He couldn't help but chuckle at the idea. At that moment Admiral Hayes assistant informed him the Admiral was ready to see him now. Chakotay arose and entered the Admiral's spacious office.

Admiral Hayes had been sitting behind a rather large desk that was covered in multiples PADDs. There were a couple of holo-images on the corner of the desk. When Chakotay walked toward him, the Admiral stood up and offered him his hand.

"It's good to see you again Chakotay," Hayes said with a smile, while shaking Chakotay's hand. "I was wondering when we were going to hear from you."

The Admiral gestured for Chakotay to take a seat and both men sat down.

"So, should I start polishing off the captain's chair of our new starship or do I need to find someone else for the job?" the admiral asked, with the hint amusement in his tone.

Chakotay pressed his lips together and then let out a deep breath, while slightly tugging on his ear. "I'm afraid it's the latter."

"I see." The Admiral appeared dismayed.

"As much as I appreciate the offer and am much honored to have Starfleet's trust in my abilities, I spent seven years in an area of space very few people have witnessed. I am proud to have served on  _Voyager_  and would do it all over again if I had to. However, I have been given an opportunity to pursue another passion of mine that has always been out of my reach and I am going to take it. I hope you understand."

Admiral Hayes nodded and said, "I understand. Seven years in space is, in fact, a long time. Well, I wish you the best in your future endeavors. And Chakotay, also know this offer always stands."

Chakotay smiled as he stood and shook the Admiral's hand. "Thank you very much sir. I appreciate your confidence," and with that Chakotay turned around and walked out of the office.

Not until Chakotay found himself back in the corridor did the slight feelings of nervousness return. As he slowly walked down the hallway he couldn't help but think what the other reason for declining the captaincy was. If he were to take Starfleet's offer, he would be in space for weeks or months, even years, at a time and the thought of being away from Kathryn that long bothered him.

Two floors separated him from Kathryn now. Only two floors. But in Chakotay's mind those two floors felt like the distance between Earth and Vulcan.

He finally reached the turbolifts and within seconds a turbolift arrived. He entered and told the computer his destination. That's when he noticed how anxious he had become. Thankfully the turbolift was empty because he was in dire need of a one-on-one pep talk.  _Chakotay keep calm. It's just Kathryn_.  _HA! Just Kathryn._ He rolled his eyes.  _There was no such thing as Just Kathryn_. He was acting like a love crazed teenager. With his internal dialogue taking up his time he hadn't noticed he had reached her floor until the doors swooshed open.

He took a deep breath and stepped out of the turbolift. His heart was racing. The layout of the sixth floor was the same as the fourth. He assumed her office would be located down the right corridor. As he was about to turn and walk down the hallway, movement caught the corner of his eye. It was her. It was Kathryn. She had just stepped out of what he concluded was her office. She had her back toward him and didn't see him. A smile quickly formed on his face. He hadn't seen her in so long. She looked wonderful. As Chakotay began to take a few steps toward her, another figure in Admiral Uniform stepped out of the office.

Chakotay stopped dead in his tracks.

Kathryn and the unidentified man were laughing. A laugh he hadn't heard from her in ages. A laugh that was almost flirtatious in nature. Chakotay thought he might be imagining things until he saw the man place his hand on her shoulder. He then slowly moved his hand from her shoulder, down her back and wrapped it around Kathryn's waist. She proceeded to wrap her arm around him as well. Both strolled down the corridor toward the opposite direction from where Chakotay stood. Chakotay could hear them talking. He couldn't decipher the words but the tone was teasing in nature. As they were almost reaching the corner, the last thing Chakotay witness was the male figure placing a kiss on Kathryn's temple. Kathryn closed her eyes, smiled, and seemed to enjoy the gesture. Then both figures disappeared.

Chakotay could not move. He could not breathe. All he felt was a straining pain in his chest. His mouth had gone dry. There was a loud pounding in his head. He needed air. He needed to leave. However, his body wasn't cooperating.

After he regained control of himself, he was able to turn around and re-enter the turbolift.  _This is **not**  how this day was supposed to turn out_. He had imagined himself meeting up with a surprised Kathryn, having lunch, and laughing about those funny incidents on  _Voyager_. He then planned on asking her to dinner where he intended to hopefully move their relationship beyond the friendships barriers. However, none of that was going to happen. Chakotay could see all his visions crumbling before him.

The turbolift reached the lobby and Chakotay stepped out. His feet felt heavy and his head felt light. He needed to get out of there quickly.

As he walked to his apartment, Chakotay's feelings of pain were replaced with those of anger. In all those years in the Delta Quadrant, Kathryn had always referred to protocols and enforced these 'parameters' and now there she was, flirting her way through the corridors of Starfleet Headquarters.  _What had happened to her?!_   _That's not the way she behaved on duty._  Chakotay stopped to think. Actually, it was. She would faintly flirt with him while on  _Voyager_ 's bridge. He would sometimes catch her glancing at him or staring at his lips when they spoke in close proximity. There were times she needlessly placed her hand on his shoulder or chest. She never did that to other crewmen, only him.

Chakotay was confused. Maybe he should have stayed on Trebus after all. His mind was traveling at warp speed. Deep down he knew his thoughts weren't rational. Maybe the man he saw wasn't part of her life. They could have just been friends and Chakotay overreacted. But the way Kathryn handled herself around him said otherwise. Kathryn didn't act like that around all men, just those she cared about.  _That woman! That woman and her bloody parameters and protocols!_ Chakotay noticed he was clenching his fist. His nostrils were flared. Yes, he was definitely not thinking rationally.

He continued to walk in this manner through the streets of San Francisco with thousands of thoughts racing through his mind.

By the time Chakotay reached his apartment he no longer knew what to make of the situation. He had realized he just didn't want her friendship, he wanted more with her. They couldn't just be friends. He figured he could stay out of her way and continue onward with his life. A part of him now regretted declining Starfleet's offer to captain his own ship. If he was lucky, he might have been assigned a year-long, deep space mission. That would have kept him safely from crossing paths with her.

He was being ridiculous. His anger was clouding his judgment. He would accept Starfleet Academy's offer as he had originally planned. Even if the Academy and Headquarters shared the same location, there was no real reason for them to ever interact with one another. It was for the better because he didn't need to know how happy she was with someone else. He didn't need to know how her day was going. He didn't need to be the one keeping track of the coffee she had consumed in the day. Someone else was taking the spot he so desired.

As he sat back in one of his chairs, by the window overlooking the Bay, he remembered once telling her he was not willing to sacrifice his present for a future that might never happen. Well, he now had no present, or future, with her by his side.

A couple of days after the occurrence at Headquarters, there were times when Chakotay felt he had definitely overreacted and should have approached her anyway. But there were other times when he persuaded himself he did the right thing. Then there were times when the mere thought of Kathryn made him cringe and he immediately made every effort to think of something else other than her.

A part of him tried to keep a positive outlook on things. He tried to convince himself the man he saw with Kathryn could have just been a friend. However, those encouraging words were soon squashed when he had a conversation with B'Elanna. It seemed the Admiral had reacquainted herself with a former friend during  _Voyager_ 's debriefings. The seriousness of the relationship was unknown. However, Chakotay did not care for the details and B'Elanna never provided them. The small glimmer of hope he still held onto instantaneously disappeared. He couldn't be angry with Kathryn. It wasn't her fault at all. She had absolutely done nothing wrong. It was his. He was angry at himself, mainly for involving himself with Seven, for letting their friendship dwindle, and for not keeping his promise to her.

With each passing day Chakotay tried to get used to the fact that he would never spend the rest of his life with her. And those thoughts sent deeps pangs of pain into his stomach.


	4. Chapter 4

**October 2378**

Chakotay found himself in his Academy office on one rather foggy Friday afternoon. It was the last day of October, just a little over two months since the dreadful incident at Starfleet Headquarters. Chakotay had not spoken to or seen Kathryn since then.

When Chakotay finally accepted Starfleet Academy's offer in August, he was only left with a couple of weeks to prepare his course work before classes began. The Academy had thought it appropriate for him to lecture about the species  _Voyager_  encountered in the Delta Quadrant. Chakotay had initially felt conflicted. As much as he wanted to share  _Voyager_ 's experiences with others, a lot of those experiences reminded him of Kathryn. He pushed those feelings aside. He couldn't let the thought of Kathryn control his existence. Enough was enough.

Chakotay had now been teaching at the Academy for several weeks. He was enjoying the experience a lot more than he imagined, mainly because it kept his mind preoccupied. He had also started to write a research paper examining Species 8472, since they were the only known species to pose a real threat to the Borg. There was also the fact Species 8472 had managed to recreate a perfect replica of Starfleet Headquarters in the Delta Quadrant. He was certain people would find that information fascinating.

Chakotay had sat in his office all day, either correcting exams or writing. He figured he needed a break, to refresh his mind, and set off to take a quick stroll through the Academy gardens. He didn't have a lecture on Friday and didn't need to be on campus, but he felt he was a lot more productive within those four walls of his office than the empty expanse of his apartment.

As soon as he stepped out of his office and began to walk down the corridor he heard a very familiar voice call out his name. It was such a beautiful, yet haunting, melody. He stopped, his heart racing, and slowly turned toward the direction of the sound.

It was Kathryn.

She looked beautiful. Well, she always looked beautiful to him. She wasn't that far down the corridor, but she quickly picked up her pace to reach him sooner.

He didn't move. He couldn't move. He felt as if his feet had become part of the floor. A thousand thoughts raced through his head.  _What is she doing here? Is she here alone? Why does she want to speak to me?_  Those thoughts quickly disappeared when Kathryn stood right in front of him.

"Hi," she said, in a low, warm whisper, a small smile slowly forming on her face. She seemed really pleased to see him.

Chakotay froze. He had already lost the ability to move and now he couldn't speak.  _What is happening to me?_

After no response from Chakotay, Kathryn's smile began to fade. "Is there something wrong, Chakotay?" Kathryn asked, with a concerned tone.

"No…I...ugh…I'm…just surprised. That's all." He tried to sound as if everything was normal. He wasn't succeeding. "Um…so Kathryn, what are you doing here?" he asked, with a slightly more accusing manner than he intended. He hoped Kathryn hadn't picked up on the tone.

Unfortunately, Kathryn had. Her face immediately tensed up. "A couple of weeks ago the Academy asked if I would like to speak to some classes about my…our experiences with the Borg in the Delta Quadrant." She paused briefly, the tension on her face slowly diminishing. "I finally had some time in my schedule to do so and here I am," she said, as she raised both arms in the air.

There was an uncomfortable pause. Both of them awkwardly glanced at each other. Chakotay was at a loss for words and the only thoughts coming to mind would probably not help the situation. He couldn't ask how her relationship was doing right off the bat. That would be rude and inconsiderate. Even if he was hurt, Kathryn did not deserve that type of treatment.

Kathryn continued to look intently at Chakotay. He seemed so lost in his own thoughts to pay much attention to her investigative look. Until this moment she hadn't realized how much she missed him. She missed their weekly dinners, their conversations on the bridge, and their occasional outings on the holodeck. She mainly missed their friendship and her ability to confide in him. She couldn't believe they hadn't spoken in months. The moment of silence was growing a little too intolerable. She didn't want to leave just yet. She wanted to know how he was doing. Kathryn decided she was the one that was going to have to break the ice.

"Chakotay, how is everything going now that you are a big shot professor at the Academy?" she asked, with a playful tone, trying to ease the tension.

Chakotay's mind finally returned to Earth when he heard Kathryn speak. Unfortunately, he hadn't been paying attention.

"I'm sorry, I didn't quite hear what you said."

"I said 'How's it going now that you are a professor?'" Kathryn simply stated, trying to hold in the laughter that was growing inside of her. She hadn't seen Chakotay this uncomfortable since…well, she actually couldn't even remember.

"Oh… it's fine. I'm enjoying it so far. It keeps me busy. How are things with you?" Chakotay asked, but was honestly not ready for the answer, especially if it was of a personal nature.

"Busy. Very busy, but somewhat…bored. I think I just became used to the fact of always being under attack in the Delta Quadrant. A desk job is quite cutting it," she said, with a furrowed brow.

"You should consider teaching. It's a lot more rewarding and fewer hours as well." Chakotay smiled. He realized this was probably the first time he had smiled all day. He was starting to feel the pressure ease between them.

"So are you going home? I don't want to hold you if you have somewhere to be," Kathryn asked, with an inquisitive look.

Chakotay missed that look. He missed a lot about her: her intelligent discourse, her scent, her stubbornness, and most of all, he missed those quirky facial expressions he wasn't sure she was aware she made.

"No. I was actually on my way to take a stroll through the gardens. I've been in my office all day and decided I needed to get out for a while. Care to join me?"

Chakotay had no idea where those words came from. A couple of minutes earlier he was barely able to speak to her and now he was inviting Kathryn to join him on his walk? He probably didn't even have to worry about his impromptu invitation; she most likely had other more important matters to attend to.

"I would love to join you," she said, with a full smile on her face.

_What have I gotten myself into?_  He wasn't ready for this, but there was no way he could back out now. At least it was a quick stroll. Fifteen minutes tops. He could survive this. He had survived worse things in the Delta Quadrant. Plus, it was just Kathryn. She wasn't an enemy, deep down she was still a friend.

"Then, shall we."

They had taken a couple of steps toward the exit, when Kathryn gently wrapped her arm around his. She had done this numerous times on  _Voyager_ , but this time it felt different. Chakotay wasn't sure if it was due to the time they had spent apart or if it was that he no longer had the optimism for their future as a couple. He wasn't complaining, because he liked the gesture, it just wasn't the same.

As they exited the building, the cold Bay wind hit their faces with force. It was also a lot foggier than he expected.

"Maybe a stroll isn't such a good idea right now. This weather isn't ideal. I wouldn't be surprised if it started to rain," Chakotay uttered, as he took a quick glance at the sky then toward Kathryn.

"I suppose not."

Chakotay was almost certain he heard some disappointment in her words. A part of him wanted to get away from the situation and return to the comforts of his office. However, another part of him wanted to stay with her longer.

"What if we get a cup of coffee from the café on campus? My treat," Chakotay suggested, knowing very well Kathryn could never refuse a cup of coffee.

Kathryn's face lit up. "You know I can never turn down a decent cup of coffee. Actually, I would never turn down a bad cup of coffee either," she said, laughing.

_That laugh_. The last time Chakotay had heard that laugh was at Starfleet Headquarters months ago. The emotions he had felt that day were starting to rise in him, but he wasn't going to let them interfere with this moment. So far they were enjoying themselves and everything was moving smoothly. He wasn't going to ruin this moment with a bout of jealousy.

"So does the Admiral still remember her way to the campus café?"

"She certainly does. I spent many a night during my days here. How do you think my caffeine addiction began?" Kathryn replied, with a sly look.

Chakotay chuckled. As they began their way to the café, which wasn't too far away, they talked minimally; mostly about minor things that had changed on the Academy grounds and the recent chilly weather. They were steering clear of all personal subject matters.

Once they arrived at the café, they found it relatively empty. It was a Friday afternoon after all. Most of the cadets were done with classes and off campus celebrating for the evening and weekend. They chose a table in the corner of the café, close to a window, which provided them a nice view of the rest of the establishment.

A waiter approached their table and asked them for their order.

"She'll have a coffee black and…" Chakotay didn't get time to finish because he was interrupted by Kathryn.

"And he'll have a coffee, cream, and two sugars. That's right, isn't it?" she said, with a smile.

"It is," he replied, grinning. He couldn't help but notice the twinkle in her eyes. Their eyes locked briefly, but they soon averted them.

The waiter left and before they could begin any conversation he returned with their orders. The smell of the coffee was enticing. Chakotay observed Kathryn as she smelled the aroma coming from her cup and took a sip. No matter how long she had been drinking coffee, her face always made it seem as if she were drinking coffee for the very first time. She took several sips before she put her cup down and looked at Chakotay.

"Chakotay," she said, in that tone she only used around him, "tell me about the course you're teaching. I've overheard it's about our experiences in the Delta Quadrant?"

"It is," he responded, as he nodded, finally taking a drink from his coffee.

He realized those were the same words he had previously spoken. Apparently he had lost the ability to elaborate. He had taken a long pause and noticed Kathryn looking at him questioningly, most likely wondering if he was going to explain further. Chakotay put his cup down and continued.

"The Academy thought it would be interesting, and well, necessary, to have a course dedicated to all the species we encountered during our seven-year mission. Even if we don't have the technology yet, slipstream drive will eventually be part of our future. Having knowledge of the Hirogen, the Kazon, and Species 8472, to just name a few, will prove beneficial for these cadets since they will presumably be the ones dealing with them once the technology is realized."

Kathryn's curiosity was spiked. Chakotay could recognize that expression anywhere. She hadn't even taken a sip of coffee as he spoke. He kept going.

"I designed the course to follow exactly as the events unfolded on  _Voyager_ , starting with the Ocampa, Kazon, and the Caretaker. I try to keep lectures interesting, but formal. I don't want our personal lives becoming the center of attraction for these students. I guess the cadets are enjoying the course since I haven't had any of them drop-out yet," he said, chuckling.

Kathryn smiled at his excitement. He truly did seem as if he was having a good time teaching. He appeared content with his professional life, but she noticed there was something that was bothering him deep down. He wasn't quite the same Chakotay as before. After many years together, she was able to detect when he wasn't being completely honest with her.

"I'm so glad you are enjoying what you are doing, Chakotay. I honestly am. But don't tell me that's all you've been doing these past few months?" Kathryn asked, gently.

"Well no, I find time to practice my boxing skills. I visit Tom and B'Elanna when our schedules allow, but honestly the course has taken a lot of my time. I didn't have a lot of time to prepare before the start of classes and since the course is new, I have to prepare everything from scratch. But as of right now I have most lectures planned out for the next month or so. I've also been working on a paper about Species 8472. I ran it by the Academy and I have their full support. I've heard rumors I might be asked to present on the topic at some universities in the near future. I'm starting to feel the pressure since I haven't even finished writing yet."

Chakotay felt he was beginning to ramble. How had he gone from barely finding the words to speak to taking over the conversation? He was growing tired of his own voice.

"How about you, Kathryn? Don't tell me you spend all your time at Headquarters?" Chakotay asked, while casually glancing at her. He could tell her previous question was draped with a double meaning, but he wasn't ready to head in that direction.

"I don't, but there are days when I feel as if my office has become a second home. There are times when I just miss being out in space. Exploring the unknown, well, not-the-too-unknown, we already did that once," she said, with a giggle. "Making contact with other species. Finding new astronomical entities. A desk job is very different, but I am glad to be home."

"At least you can visit your mom and sister. How are they?"

"They are doing well. The fact that I can see and talk to them when I want feels surreal. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night thinking it was all a dream and we never made it back to Earth. I hope those nightmares diminish over time because they are quite unsettling." She paused briefly. "I finally met Phoebe's sons. They are 2 years apart but both equally rambunctious. They remind me so much of her when she was a child. It's uncanny how offspring can be identical in so many ways to their parent. After spending a weekend with them I feel I was less tired when dealing with the Borg Queen!" She laughed. "But spending time my family is the best part of being home."

Chakotay smiled at her and took his final sip from his coffee cup. Oddly enough, Kathryn still had some coffee left, but he was almost positive she wouldn't decline a second cup.

After ordering more coffee, there was a lull in the conversation. They continued to drink while casually glancing at each other and around the café, which was now empty except for the two of them and the servers. They had been there a little over an hour and it was now getting dark outside. They had both avoided the questions they desperately wanted to ask, but didn't want the answers to, until Kathryn broke the silence.

"I heard you went to Trebus after the debriefings. Did Seven enjoy the trip?" she asked, discreetly, while staring down at her coffee cup and taking a sip.

_There it was. It was finally out. The_ _targ_ _in the room was finally being addressed_. Chakotay lowered his head. He took a moment to control his feelings. He didn't want the situation to get anymore awkward than it already was, well, at least for him. He looked up and saw Kathryn still staring at her coffee cup.

"I went alone," he whispered.

Kathryn looked up immediately and her eyes made brief contact with his. Chakotay couldn't read her. She had many years to practice her captain's façade and he was unable to tell what she was feeling exactly. Chakotay had enough.

"Kathryn, we really need to discuss this. We cannot continue to dance around the topic," Chakotay said, firmly. "We can't act as if everything is okay between us when it clearly isn't. We haven't spoken in months and we can't just have coffee out of the blue and act as if everything is normal."

Kathryn sat back in her chair, with her hands wrapped around her cup. She lifted her gaze and looked directly at him. She could either be angry or relieved for all he knew.

"Why didn't you ever contact me since we last saw each other?"

Even if her face was emotionless, her voice was not. There was a slight crack in her tone.

"I didn't think you wanted me to."

"Of course I did."

"I was…ashamed and angry. The way you found out about…Seven and me…it wasn't right. It shouldn't have been that way."

"No. No, it shouldn't have happened that way, but it did." There was definitely pain in her tone now.

"Seven and I should have never happened. It was a moment of weakness on my part. Our relationship didn't last long and we broke things off before I left for Trebus. We really didn't have anything in common."

"If the Admiral hadn't shown up, were you planning to tell me? Or did you plan on keeping it a secret until the rumors finally made their way to me?" she said, while staring at him. The pain in her tone had disappeared and was now replaced by an undecipherable one.

"I don't know, Kathryn. I'm sorry."

Chakotay didn't know what else to say. This isn't how he wanted the evening to unfold but this needed to be resolved at some point.

"You don't have to apologize. You really didn't do anything wrong. I just expected something else from you, that's all. I just presumed we had this unspoken, mutual agreement. I just assumed wrong." Kathryn took another sip from her cup. Her eyes stayed focused on the table.

They both sat in silence for several minutes. The air around them felt tense. Either they would end their evening on this note or they would try to resolve the matter. Then Chakotay realized he wasn't the only one that was responsible for them drifting apart. She wasn't entirely single herself. The thought of Kathryn with that man sent a trickle of jealously down his spine.

"When I arrived from Trebus I went to Headquarters to decline my offer. I was planning on visiting you that day." He glanced at her and returned his focus on his cup. "By the time I made it to your floor I realized you weren't alone and from the looks of it you weren't alone in more ways than one," Chakotay said with as much control as possible.

Kathryn didn't know what to say. She was somewhat shocked. She never would have imagined Chakotay had seen her with William. She tried to keep her personal life somewhat private. Their relationship, if you could call a couple dates that, hadn't lasted very long.

When  _Voyager_  arrived home she knew Chakotay would not be there for her. He had other things on his mind. She had accepted the facts. During their debriefings she reunited with William, a current Admiral and also a former colleague on the Al-Batani. She had always found him intriguing. When he asked her out to dinner, she accepted without hesitation. There was no reason she could not proceed with her life now that  _Voyager_  was safely home. Even though Kathryn thought William was interesting, smart, and good-looking, the spark was just not there. She couldn't continue in a relationship where she was not completely pleased. By the end of August they had decided to go their own ways. By this time, she had found out Chakotay and Seven were no longer a couple. From the brief conversations she had with Tom or B'Elanna, all she knew was that Chakotay had gone to Trebus soon after their debriefings ended.

"Is that the  _real_  reason you never contacted me when you returned from Trebus?" Kathryn asked, coolly. "Because you thought I was in a relationship?"

Chakotay closed his eyes and took a deep breath, "Honestly, yes. I wasn't going to interfere in your life. You were home and you were living your life for once. The whole situation with Seven did play a role as well. But I just want to let you know that I am happy for you, Kathryn. As long as this man respects you and treats you how you should be treated, then I am glad for you. I wish you both a long, loving journey."

It dawned on Kathryn that Chakotay was not aware she was no longer dating William. She just assumed he knew since he talked to B'Elanna from time to time.  _Had B'Elanna not mentioned this to him? Or maybe I am not a topic of conversation between them?_  This would explain his behavior when they met right outside his office earlier. She could either tell him the truth right away or she could let him dwell in his pain for a while longer. He did sincerely appear to regret what had occurred with Seven. And Kathryn had time to deal with those feelings as well.

"What exactly did you see when you went to visit me?" she asked.

Chakotay looked at her. He wasn't sure he could tell her what he saw without sounding bitter. He really did not want to tell her how he saw this man place his hand on her waist and hold her tight to him. He didn't want to say how he saw him place a kiss on her temple. He didn't want to tell her how she appeared to enjoy that kiss and how she seemed so very happy with him.

"I witnessed both of you exit from your office and you both walked arm in arm down a corridor," he said, in a rather rigid tone. He was so desperately trying to hide his jealousy.

Kathryn was trying very hard to suppress a smile, but wasn't succeeding very well. Chakotay was now acting the same way as when Q showed up and wanted her to be his mate. That had happened years ago, but Kathryn found Chakotay's actions rather charming, hence why she could never forget that moment.

Chakotay was staring at her. He didn't look very pleased. Most likely because a smile was plastered full force on her face.

"Well,  _Admiral_ , I'm glad you find this amusing," Chakotay said, without trying to hide the scorn behind his voice.

"Oh Chakotay, jealousy doesn't suit you," she replied with a laugh and placed her hand on his. Their skin on skin contact felt wonderful. She decided she would clear the air before her former Commander had a heart attack.

"The man you saw me with is William. We were colleagues on the Al-Batani. We dated for a while but decided to end our relationship a little over two months ago."

Chakotay's demeanor changed completely when he listened to Kathryn's words. The feelings of sadness, remorse, and anger left his body and were replaced with a sense of hope and optimism. He looked at Kathryn with a smile on his face, knowing very well what this meant. There was a chance they could now have what they couldn't while on  _Voyager_. But he didn't want to rush into anything either. They hadn't seen each other in months and jumping into something wasn't the smartest idea. They still needed to work things out and reacquaint themselves. Their lives on Earth were very different from those they had on  _Voyager_. However, he wasn't going to let another opportunity slip him by.

"What are you doing tomorrow night?" he asked, with an air of confidence.

"I don't have concrete plans. I had thought of visiting my mom for dinner. Why?"

"I want you to have dinner with me. Both of us, like we did on  _Voyager_ every week. I miss your friendship. I want to make it right again."

"I would love that, Chakotay," Kathryn replied, with a beaming smile.

They had been at the café for more than two hours. It was getting late, not that either of them wanted to leave. They agreed to meet each other the next day. The thought sent a rush of uneasiness into Chakotay's stomach. But it was a good feeling. And with that, they both stood up and walked out of the café arm in arm into the night.


	5. Chapter 5

**November 2378**

It was the first day of November. It had been a rather sunny and comfortable day compared to the gloomy and chilly day before. Chakotay felt as if the weather was associated with his mood. He had woken with a sense of optimism and cheerfulness he hadn't felt in what? Weeks? Months? Years? He didn't even remember, but it really didn't matter much now. The past was the past and he was only looking toward the future. There was such a sense of possibility on his horizon.

Chakotay hadn't slept very much the night before; he kept replaying the outing with Kathryn over and over in his head. It was the first time in months where he didn't mind losing some sleep. He kept thinking how many things could have gone differently. He could have decided to not take a stroll. He could have stayed home altogether. She could have declined his offer for coffee. So many things could have gone astray, but they didn't. For once, everything fell into place. When Chakotay finally fell asleep, he wasn't plagued with dreams of horrific events in his life; he was able to have pleasant visions of what his future might hold.

Kathryn had agreed to meet him at his favorite Indian restaurant located in the North Beach neighborhood of San Francisco. Even though North Beach was still referred to as "Little Italy" even after centuries, there was a mixture of other eateries throughout the area. Chakotay had found this little restaurant, by chance, on one of his many walks throughout the city one night. On his return from Trebus, Chakotay found walking the streets of San Francisco to have a calming effect. He enjoyed finding a nice place to eat, sitting back, and observing the people going about their day. For the first time since August, he was finally going to have a companion for dinner that would have his full attention. There would be no reason for "people watching" to fill his time.

They had decided to meet at 20:00 hours. It was currently 18:00. Chakotay was full of anticipation he constantly asked the computer for the time. If he didn't know better, he was almost certain the computer was getting annoyed by his constant requests. The anticipation was beginning to get overwhelming. In about two hours he would be having dinner with Kathryn. Just them two, alone, for the night.

Chakotay couldn't wait for his first date with Kathryn. He didn't consider the dinners he shared with Kathryn on  _Voyager_  as dates, even if they appeared to be so. She really put a lot of effort into those dinners: candles, music, and flowers. It made it very hard to not think of them as dates, but that was the only way Chakotay was able to cope with their unchangeable situation onboard the ship.

Chakotay had managed to keep himself somewhat busy throughout the day. He practiced his boxing, wrote some more of his paper, prepared a couple more lessons, and read. However, the time for them to meet was getting so close, he was not able to focus on any one task for more than a couple minutes at a time. He requested the computer play a selection of Jazz music while he made himself a cup of tea. He chose not replicate his tea since he figured it would provide him with another distraction if he actually made it.

"Computer, what is the current time?"

"The time is now18:35."

He was feeling anxious. He shouldn't be, but he was. Chakotay wondered what Kathryn was doing at this moment. Was she as anxious as he? Or was she going about her day as she would any other. He thought about contacting her but reconsidered. He could wait a little over an hour to see her. He decided he might as well begin to get ready. It wouldn't take him long, but at least it would give him something to do meanwhile.

After Chakotay showered, he slipped into a pair of black slacks, a light blue button down shirt, and black loafers. He had considered wearing a tie but he immediately vetoed the idea. It would appear too formal. This dinner was causal; a dinner among old friends.

He had sufficiently paced around his bedroom, then his balcony, and then the living room, while drinking another cup of tea, when he asked the computer once more for the time.

"The time is now 19:20."

Chakotay decided he would leave now. It would only take him about twenty minutes to walk to their agreed location. He would just wait for her to arrive outside the restaurant. There was no way he could spend any more time in his apartment. As he left, he grabbed his coat and took a deep breath.

=/\=

Chakotay arrived at the restaurant in record time. He had started off walking at a slow pace, but by the time he was only several blocks away from his destination, he was almost certain he was partially running. There were still thirty minutes left before Kathryn was supposed to arrive. He didn't want to go into the restaurant just yet. He needed the cool night air to keep him sane. He leaned against the wall of a passageway right next to the eatery. He stood there for a couple minutes trying to remain calm, when he noticed a bench outside the restaurant had been left unoccupied. He made his way to the bench and took a seat. Chakotay began to conjure up topics to discuss during dinner to fill the time. He knew from previous experience there would not be lack of conversation. However, since their lives had gone through a rather tumultuous state, he wasn't sure the conversation was going to be as easy to come by.

_What are safe topics to talk about?_   _Definitely the crew. I'm sure she knows more about the crew than I do. What else? Miral! Yes! Another safe subject. I could ask what she did on her leave but that may be a grey area…_

Chakotay was so lost in his train of thought he didn't realize there was a figure was approaching him from behind. He jumped and turned around when a delicate hand touched his shoulder.

"Kathryn! You nearly gave me a heart attack! I never expected you to be here this early," he exclaimed, trying to catch his breath.

Kathryn was holding back laughter. "I could say the same thing to you. Where were you right now? You seemed a million light years away."

"Um…I was just letting my mind wander, that's all." He didn't want to tell her the truth.

"So shall we go inside? I'm starving. Coffee doesn't make for a meal really," she said, smiling.

They both walked side by side until they reached the door. The door swooshed open and they both entered the restaurant. As soon as they entered, Kathryn was hit by the aroma of wonderful smelling spices. She was also surprised by the décor. The colors were bright and beautiful. There were statues and paintings of various things. She assumed some might have served some religious purpose but wasn't sure. She was fascinated. She made a mental note to ask Chakotay about some of these objects later.

Chakotay noticed Kathryn observing their surroundings. He knew she would find this place intriguing. As she continued to take in the setting, he realized he had paid very little attention to her appearance. His initial shock when they first met made it hard to focus. Her hair was slightly longer than before. She had it pinned on the sides but let the rest loose. She wore just the right amount of make-up, which enhanced her already beautiful natural features. The color of her lipstick contrasted nicely against the fair color of her skin. And she wore a grey, form-fitted coat that hugged her curves just perfectly.

As Kathryn turned around to face Chakotay to ask him a question, she couldn't help but realize he was staring at her. Before she could ask what he was doing, the host from the restaurant appeared to show them to their table.

They followed the young gentlemen to a table near the back of the restaurant in a rather secluded area. The restaurant was fairly full, but somehow they had managed to acquire a table away from the rest of the patrons. Kathryn found this somewhat odd. As soon as they sat down another older gentleman approached the table.

"Well Chakotay, it is nice to see you again, my friend," he said, shaking Chakotay's hand. "This must be the companion you talked about when you contacted us earlier. You never mentioned she was so lovely. No wonder you requested this table," he said, with a mischievous smile and raised eyebrow.

_Now it made sense why they were so far from everyone else_. She noticed Chakotay blushing slightly. He was clearly uncomfortable, but trying to keep his feelings under control.

Chakotay cleared his throat. "I requested this table because it provides the best view of the restaurant and I was sure Kathryn would appreciate the décor."

The older man grinned and patted Chakotay on the shoulder, "Of course, my friend, of course. By the look of your friend's face, I say she believes you just as much as I do. Well, I don't want to take up any more of your time. I hope you two enjoy your dinner and let me know if there is anything else I can do for you." He turned around and walked away from their table leaving them alone.

Kathryn was amused. A smirk formed on her face and she couldn't help but gaze at Chakotay. He was avoiding her eye contact while fiddling with a napkin and looking at the PADD that held the menu. That's when Kathryn noticed she was still wearing her coat. She slowly undid the buttons and placed it on the back of her chair. Since Chakotay had yet to speak she picked up the PADD and began to look over their options.

"So what do you recommend since you appear to be a regular here," she teased.

When Chakotay finally looked up from the PADD, he was met with such a breathtaking image. Kathryn wore a navy blue top that was tight against her body. He couldn't quite tell what the material was but it looked soft from his perspective. It was short sleeved and had a rather low-cut front. It was probably the most revealing item of clothing he had ever seen her wear, well, except for that towel she sported on New Earth.

"You look beautiful," he said.

Kathryn looked up at him, smiled, and returned her look to the menu. "I don't see 'You look beautiful' on the menu."

Chakotay couldn't help but laugh. "It's a special order."

"Oh I see. Must be delicious," Kathryn replied.

They both laughed. The slightly awkward moment from before forgotten. Kathryn continued to look over the menu.

"I'm not sure what most of these items are, Chakotay. Care to elaborate?"

Chakotay smiled. "Would you mind if I ordered for the both of us? A lot of these entrees are large enough to serve two people."

In a move that was not typical of Kathryn Janeway, she agreed. She liked to have control and make the final decision but she figured when it came to food she could let those rules slide.

The waiter appeared and set two glasses of water on the table. "Are you ready to order?"

"Yes, I would like to start with samosas. Then have the biryani, palak paneer, and the chole bhature. Also, would you please make the dishes on the milder side." Chakotay looked at Kathryn, "I don't think you want them very spicy."

Kathryn frowned, "I can take any level of spicy, Chakotay. You don't have to modify the order for my sake."

_Typical stubborn Kathryn_. "Ok, we will take everything spicy," he said to the waiter.

The waiter nodded, repeated the order, and when everything was correct he left to place the order with the chef.

"I think you are in for a treat."

"I'm sure I am," she said, politely.

Kathryn had cuisine from various cultures, but never Indian. She wasn't sure how that had happened. She was positive she could handle the spicy nature of the food. She had survived seven years of leola root consumption, she was certain she could handle some spiciness.  _How spicy could it actually be_?

While she was lost in thought, the waiter arrived and placed a plate of triangular shaped pastries on the table.

"These are samosas," he told Kathryn. "They are mostly eaten as a snack or appetizer. These in particular are filled with potatoes, peas, and spices. But you can also have them filled with meat. Try one."

Kathryn reached for one of the warm pastries. They smelled delicious. She took a bite.

"These are wonderful. The combination of textures is amazing. Also, they aren't too spicy either," she said, with a smirk and raised eyebrows.

They both made small talk while they continued to eat the samosas. They talked about the wonderful weather and what they had done during their day. Chakotay was surprised to find out Kathryn had stayed home reading because the anticipation for their evening dinner didn't allow her to focus on any other task but reading.  _At least I wasn't the only one_.

Before they could continue onto a different topic of conversation, the rest of their food arrived. Three large dishes were placed in front of them, followed by a basket of this flat looking bread. They both thanked the servers.

"The scents are just wonderful. They're just so different from what I'm used to," Kathryn said, intrigued.

Chakotay was delighted Kathryn was enjoying herself so far. He pointed at one of the dishes, "This is called biryani. It's basmati rice with vegetables and spices. Well everything has spices," he said, with a chuckle and continued. "That dish over there is palak paneer. Palak is spinach and paneer is cheese. The spinach is pureed and then cheese is added. This last dish is chole bhuture, which is basically chickpea curry." He looked at Kathryn who was trying to take in all the information.

"What is this called," Kathryn said, as she pointed to the basket of bread.

"That's called naan. You can use it to scoop the food off of your plate or eat it alone if you like."

They both began to serve themselves on their own plates. Kathryn could not wait to try the assortment of food. She was sure she would not be disappointed. She observed Chakotay as he grabbed a piece of naan, scooped some of the chole and put it into his mouth. She mimicked his behavior.

Kathryn had only taken one bite of her food when her tongue was assaulted by the fire of the spices. She could feel the heat rising in her body. She swallowed and immediately reached for the glass of water. She took a drink and was almost certain the water had made the situation worse. She was so busy trying to put out the flames attacking her mouth she had not realized Chakotay observing her. When she finally felt under control, she looked up and noticed him staring at her.

"Are you ok?" he said, while desperately trying to hide a smile.

"Of course I am. Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well, I think your face has gone through twenty shades of red in the past minute. I would call your current shade  _command red_ ," he replied, with a muffled laugh. "We can order something else if you like?"

"No. I am perfectly fine."

Kathryn continued to eat. She wasn't sure if her taste buds had corroded away or if she was simply becoming accustomed to the spiciness of the food because she started to enjoy her meal. She could sense Chakotay glancing at her from time to time.

Their conversation wasn't as fulfilling as the ones they had on  _Voyager_. They were once again steering clear from any topic which could make the wonderful evening they were having so far go south.

They both finished their food almost at the same time. All the plates were relatively empty and the naan was gone.

"How did you enjoy the meal?" Chakotay asked.

"It was rather interesting, once I got used to the spiciness. Maybe next time I will try a something milder."

"Next time?" Chakotay said, with a questionable tone.

Kathryn froze and looked at him.  _Was this a one-time thing?_   _Had she jumped to conclusions?_

"Oh I just assumed…" she trailed off.

Chakotay saved her from her uneasiness. "I just assumed next time we would go to  _your_  favorite restaurant instead," he replied, smiling, those lovely dimples of his in full view.

The waiter arrived to clear the table of the empty dishes.

"Do you have room for dessert? There's a wonderful place a few blocks over I think you will enjoy."

"I think I can manage some dessert. As long as it isn't made of fire."

The both laughed as they stood up, put on their coats, and walked out of the restaurant, thanking the host and the older man as they left.

=/\=

They arrived at a very small establishment. It was a rather cute looking place. The window was lined up with an assortment of cakes, cookies, and small pastries. Kathryn was surprised she had never seen it before. There was a small sign on the window that read, "We specialize in coffee-flavored goods." She smiled immediately and knew why Chakotay had suggested this place for their next stop.

Chakotay noticed Kathryn smile as she read the sign. He always knew she would love this place. "I've walked by this location a dozen times and every time I think of you when I do," he stated, with a somewhat somber tone. "I have yet to try any of their desserts hoping one day we could try one together."

Kathryn couldn't help but pick up on his tone. So much had happened between them recently, but they were now at a place where they could finally work on something that had flourished in the past couple of years. There was nothing, other than themselves, stopping them from exploring their attraction.

Kathryn turned to face Chakotay, she placed a hand on his chest, something she had done many times on  _Voyager_ , and quietly said, "Well, I'm here now."

They both gazed into each other's eyes. There was so much emotion and desire being transmitted between their looks.

Kathryn could feel the heat from Chakotay's body on her own and his warm breath lightly caressing her skin. She still had her hand placed on his chest. She could feel his heart beat rapidly increasing. Before the moment could get any tenser, she lowered her gaze, took a step back, removed her hand from his chest and said, "let's find something we will both enjoy."

Chakotay forced a smiled and followed her into the eatery.

=/\=

They shared a mocha-flavored cake Kathryn chose. It was exquisite. The cake was light and fluffy with the right amount of sweetness. It was layered with a coffee-flavored cream and the entire cake was covered in chocolate shards and a whipped frosting that felt like air in their mouths. They had both thoroughly enjoyed their dessert, but Chakotay had a better time watching Kathryn eat the cake than actually eating the cake himself.

Once they began their walk home, they both noticed the night air was a lot cooler than before. When they had walked from the Indian restaurant to the dessert place, they had walked side by side, with some distance between them. Now, Chakotay noticed they were walking rather close, touching occasionally as they each took a step. He wondered if it would be a bold move to wrap his arm around Kathryn's shoulder. However, before he could ponder his move any further, Kathryn wrapped her arm within his like she had done the day before.

They walked arm in arm talking about the current whereabouts of former crewmembers of  _Voyager_. Many had been reassigned to new starships, some were now working at headquarters or independent projects, and a few had decided to leave Starfleet altogether. As they continued their conversation, they discovered they lived only a couple blocks from each other. Chakotay found it interesting how he never ran into her during the past months. Then he came to the conclusion Kathryn spent most of her time at Headquarters, or Indiana, and he spent most of his time at the Academy. There was a slim chance they would have run into each other otherwise.

They arrived at his apartment building first. Chakotay did not want the evening to end, even though it was a bit past 23:00. There was an awkward pause in their conversation before Chakotay suggested Kathryn join him for a cup of coffee to close out the night. He wasn't sure she would agree since this was his apartment and not some Academy café. He didn't want to seem too forward. However, she agreed.

=/\=

When Kathryn entered his apartment she noticed it was sparsely decorated. She was positive his quarters on  _Voyager_  had more flare than his current living space. She wondered if he just never had time to add some of his personal touches or if he rather live like this. Most of the items she did see were books or PADDs scattered on tables.

Chakotay replicated two cups of coffee as Kathryn wandered the living room area of his apartment. There wasn't much for her to see. He had never bothered adding most of his personal items for display. He didn't spend enough time at home and no one really ever visited him so they sat in storage bins in his spare room.

Kathryn had removed her coat and taken a seat on one of his chairs. He approached her and handed her the cup of coffee, as he took the seat across from her. They sat in silence as they both took sips of the hot drink.

"I had a wonderful time today with you, Chakotay," Kathryn said, breaking the silence.

"I did too. I hope we can do this again, soon."

"Of course, but let's stay away from the spicy stuff for a while. I'm not sure my mouth has fully recovered yet," she said, laughing.

She was wonderful, she always was. Her eyes twinkled in the light of the room, Chakotay observed. He just wanted to savor this moment forever.

"How about we listen to some music? Are you in the mood for some Jazz?" Chakotay asked.

"I didn't know you were a Jazz man?"

"Tom. I blame Tom. He was listening to this stuff when I stopped for a visit once. I found it to be so… relaxing. And now I cannot get enough of it."

Chakotay requested the computer play the same playlist from before. The sounds of a trumpet and piano filled the room. He watched as Kathryn leaned back into the chair, closed her eyes, and took in the music.

A thought came rushing into Chakotay's mind, something he always wanted to do with Kathryn. Well, there were many things he wanted to do with her, but he always regretted the fact that he never had been able to share a dance with her while on  _Voyager_. He was going to correct that regret immediately.

"Would you like to dance?" Chakotay asked, sweetly, reaching forward and extending his hand toward her.

Kathryn slowly opened her eyes and looked at him. For a moment, Chakotay was certain she was going to decline his offer. She didn't answer; she simply took his hand, smiled, and stood up. He followed suit.

Kathryn's hand felt so small and fragile inside of his. He led Kathryn to an open space in the room.

"Computer, play Chet Baker's 'It's Always You.'"

The song selection changed and the room was filled with the soft keys of a piano followed by the calm voice of a male singer.

Chakotay moved closer to Kathryn. He wrapped his arm around her waist and rested his hand on the small of her back. His hand still holding her other hand. She felt so petite in his grasp. This was the first time he was holding her so close to him in a moment that wasn't surrounded by distress. She slowly moved her hand onto his shoulder. She felt tense in his arms. He could feel her rapidly breathing against his chest. She wasn't looking at him; she was staring off into some unknown point in the distance. Due to their height difference, Chakotay was able to see all her movements.

They began to slowly sway from side to side to the rhythm, barely moving their feet. Chakotay noticed Kathryn beginning to relax with every step they made together. The hand she had so rigidly placed on his shoulder felt softer and was now moving slowly toward his back. The electricity between them was intensifying.

Chakotay slightly tensed up when he felt Kathryn place her cheek against his broad chest and lean into him. Her warmth felt amazing against his body. He moved his hand from the small of her back higher up. He slowly rubbed her back in a circular motion. He then rested his cheek on the top of her head. She smelled wonderful.

They continued to sway as the music filled the room. Chakotay knew words were being sung but was unaware what they were. He was so pleasantly lost in this moment he hadn't realized the song had ended.

They both slowly stopped moving but neither of them stepped away from the other. They stood in silence, holding one another in the same manner until Chakotay felt Kathryn move. He lifted his head and their eyes met.

So many emotions, so many unspoken words were being transmitted between them. They had experienced so much together, but this was probably the most intimate moment they had ever shared in seven plus years they had known each other.

Chakotay let go of Kathryn's hand and removed the other from her back. Both hands made their way to Kathryn's face, where he gently placed them on her cheeks.

He moved closer to her and whispered, "You don't know how long I've waited for this moment." And with that, Chakotay moved toward her until his lips made contact with hers. Her lips felt warm and soft against his. Her lips reciprocated his movements and soon they were bound in this intense moment of passion; a moment that had the power of years of undeclared love.

They eventually parted lips and stared a bit longer at each other. They both had soft smiles on their faces and happiness in their eyes. They hugged one another and stood in silence. They hadn't spoken.

Kathryn didn't want to leave but was sure she wasn't ready for more to happen between them just yet. If she stayed, she knew they would not be able to resist temptation. Granted, this intensity had been building for years, but it wasn't necessary for them to explore it all in one night. It was just too new. Too fresh. They still had time. Plenty of time.

"I think I should be going now," she said, with a smile. "It is rather late."

Chakotay didn't want to see her leave but understood and nodded in acceptance.

"Let me walk you home," he said.

"It's okay. I'll just request a site-to-site transport. I am, in fact, an Admiral. I should be able to abuse my privileges from time to time," she replied, with a chuckle.

"Fair enough."

"Good night Chakotay. I had a wonderful time with you." She placed a quick kiss on his lips, called for a transport, and Chakotay watched as she dematerialized from his apartment.


	6. Chapter 6

**December 2378**

_Where could she be?_  Kathryn was running twenty minutes late. That wasn't typical Kathryn behavior. And when she wasn't planning to arrive on time, she always contacted him beforehand. He wasn't necessarily nervous since he knew she wasn't in any danger at Headquarters, but still, he couldn't help but worry a little.

He was sitting alone on the patio of the café located at Starfleet Headquarters. He met her at the Headquarters café twice a week, and she did the same at the Academy café after they were both done for the day. He had already ordered some coffee since it was the middle of December and rather chilly out. He should probably not be sitting outside but he rather enjoyed the climate. Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending on your view of the weather, it didn't snow in San Francisco. He was quite fond of the snow. _Maybe Kathryn and I can go away for a weekend. Lake Tahoe would be perfect this time of year_. Before he could let his mind wander to ways they could keep each other warm in the cold temperature, he noticed Kathryn approaching him. She looked tired.

Chakotay knew better than to start a conversation with her when she was tired, angry, or had just woken up, without having a cup a coffee ready. He got up, ordered her some coffee, and returned to the table by the time she reached him.

"You know me so well," she said, as she took a seat. The smile she gave him appeared to be taking all her energy to produce. She picked up the cup of coffee and took several sips before continuing to talk. "I'm so sorry I'm late Chakotay. I didn't have time to let you know. So many meetings today and every single one ran over. I'm so glad vacation is only a couple of days away."

Chakotay smiled. "Those are words I never expected Vice Admiral Kathryn Janeway to say, 'I'm so glad vacation is only a couple of days away'. Are you sure you're feeling ok? You haven't been taken over by some entity, have you?" he said, laughing.

Kathryn rolled her eyes. "Very funny. I'm just so tired and for once I am going to admit, I need a break. I didn't take enough time off once  _Voyager_  returned and now I'm paying for it."

"Well, just think, in a couple days we will be in Indiana for the holidays and we will have plenty of time to relax."

"I can't wait for you to meet my mother. And Phoebe," replied Kathryn, as she placed her hand on his and squeezed it gently.

They both sat in silence as they stared at each other, smiling. Kathryn slowly let go of his hand and asked, "How was your lecture today?"

"Nothing special. Just the Vidiians." Chakotay couldn't help but laugh. He never thought the term 'Just the Vidiians' would be words he uttered so nonchalantly.

Kathryn looked at him slightly confused. "Care to elaborate?"

"I just find it amusing that we can now refer to this species so casually. When on Voyager just mentioning their name would send shudders down my spine," Chakotay said.

"Yours and mine," retorted Kathryn.

They both laughed.

They had come a long way since their first date at the Indian restaurant. It had been a month and a half since then and they were enjoying each other's company more than they could have ever imagined. They hardly spent anytime apart anymore. It had only taken a few dates to refer to themselves as a couple. A couple more dates for the lovely spoken words of 'I love you' and just a bit more before Chakotay first spent the night at Kathryn's apartment.

That night was full of passion, desire, and seven years of unmitigated love. They had danced around the subject for some time. There was always some sort of pretext: early meeting, late lecture, or some other excuse. It was something they both wanted, but were also finding ways around. Until one night they let themselves cross the barriers they so desperately wanted to. The friendship, the love, and the longing they both had for each could no longer be held back. It was a night both would never forget. Since then, they had never spent a night alone, either in Kathryn's, or Chakotay's, apartment.

"Do you mind if we leave? I'm just so tired and wouldn't mind a long, hot bath," Kathryn said.

"Anything you want,  _Admiral,"_  whispered Chakotay, arching an eyebrow.

Kathryn slightly rolled her eyes, smiled, and moved her head from side to side. "You manage to make that sound so…improper,  _Professor_."

It had become a running joke between them. After a couple dates, Chakotay felt comfortable enough around Kathryn to start calling her 'honey' or 'sweetie.' He noticed she never reciprocated the terms. Not until awhile later he found out she was not too keen on pet names, as she called them. The only people she ever allowed her to call her those names were her parents. In a moment of slight embarrassment, Chakotay said he was just going to call her Admiral, since that was, in fact, her title and she couldn't argue with that. However, Chakotay had managed to find every possible way to make the simple word of 'Admiral' into a truly seductive term. Not to be left behind, Kathryn began to call him 'Professor' using her most provocative tone.

Chakotay took Kathryn's hand as they both stood up. They briefly walked with their hands joined until he let go and wrapped his arm around her shoulder and gave her a gentle squeeze. "Your place or mine?" he asked.

"Mine. I have a bigger bathtub," she said, as she winked at him.

"Oh…I see," Chakotay replied, as he tried to suppress a nervous laugh. No matter the status of their relationship, she still managed to astonish him. They continued to walk together, talking about other day occurrences until they left Headquarter grounds.

=/\=

Kathryn was scrambling around her apartment making last minute packing decisions. She would be gone for a week and didn't want to forget anything important. In all honestly, she could just replicate what she forgot, if that was the case, but part of her didn't like that idea around her traditionalist mother. She knew she should have taken the time to pack the night before since she was sure she wasn't going to have enough time this morning, but other impromptu plans had changed her mind. She was just going to blame Chakotay. It was his fault after all. It was his idea to have a late dinner, take a walk, and not leave until 09:30 this morning. Her mother was expecting them at 11:00 in Indiana. It was currently 10:30 and she was still in her night gown and robe.

The chime to her apartment door went off.  _It must be Chakotay_.  _How did he manage to get everything done in about an hour?_ She answered the door and sure enough it was him. He stood in the door way looking rather handsome holding his duffle bag. He seemed quite relaxed, the complete opposite from Kathryn's current state.

"Good morning again,  _Admiral_ ," he said, with a rather chipper tone and a beaming smile.

Kathryn rolled her eyes. She didn't have time for his good-humored attitude at this moment. Any other time she would find it charming. Right now, not so much.

Chakotay noticed her frenzied demeanor and thought of something to try to calm her down. As he walked into the apartment he placed a gentle kiss on Kathryn's cheek and slowly wrapped his arms around her waist. He kissed her cheek some more, and then laid a path of kisses down her jawline to her neck. He snuggled against her neck for a while as he held her closer to him, rubbing his hands against her back and feeling the soft material of her robe. By this time he had managed to move her gently against a wall.

On any other day Kathryn would enjoy his amorous intentions. Right now, she had other things on her mind, mainly, getting to her destination on time.

"We don't have time for this, Chakotay," Kathryn said, in between heavy breaths.

"We can be a little late," he whispered, while nibbling on her earlobe.

"No, we can't. Not today."

"You're right. It wouldn't be a good first impression, would it?" He let her go, but not before kissing her again on the lips. "So what can I do to help you out?"

"I'm almost done packing, but still need to shower and get dressed. Would you mind packing the last few things for me?" she said, as they moved into her bedroom. The bed was still in the disheveled state Chakotay had left it in earlier this morning.

"Sure. So, nothing but my favorite nightgowns, right?" Chakotay said, while trying to hide an impish smile.

"Cha-ko-tay!" Kathryn exclaimed, as she sighed deeply and rolled her eyes.

"I'm sorry. I can't help it. You're just so cute when you're stressed," he replied. "What else do you need to pack?"

Kathryn had already walked into the bathroom. "There are some PADDs on the living room table. I need those. And a couple wrapped gifts on top of the dresser. I think that's it," she yelled from inside the shower.

Chakotay gathered her things and placed them all within her duffle bag. He then began to make the bed. By the time he was done placing the pillows against the headboard, Kathryn was stepping out from the bathroom.

"You look beautiful," he said.

"You always say that."

"It's because it's always true."

Kathryn moved closer to Chakotay, wrapped her arms around his neck, and kissed him tenderly on the lips.

"I thought we didn't have time for this?" Chakotay said, teasingly.

"We don't," she sighed, as she pulled away from him. "Let's get going."

"Relax, Kathryn. We have enough time to get there. It's only a couple minutes to the transport station, which shouldn't be busy on a Saturday morning, then a couple more to Indiana. We will make it on time," he told her, rubbing her arm.

"I sure hope you are right,  _Professor_."

Chakotay smiled while he grabbed both their bags. They walked out of her apartment toward the transport station.

=/\=

Kathryn and Chakotay arrived at Gretchen Janeway's front door at 10:58. Their trip could not have been any smoother.

Chakotay stood a little behind Kathryn as he waited for the front door to open. He hadn't been very nervous this morning, or even on the transport over, but all of a sudden feelings of anxiety began to haunt his stomach.

Before those feelings could make a permanent home, an older lady opened the door. She had the same features as Kathryn: same color eyes, same strong chin, and same prominent cheekbones. The only noticeable difference was the white color of her hair. She reminded Chakotay of the future Admiral Janeway that had help them return home sooner than expected. He owed her so much really. Without her he would not be where he currently was.

"Kathryn! I'm so glad to see you," she said, as she gave her daughter a hug. "And Chakotay! I'm so excited to finally meet you!"

"Thank you Mrs. Janeway. I've heard so many great things about you from Kathryn, I feel I have known you for years," he said, taking her hand, bowing slightly, and placing a kiss on it.

"Well, Kathryn. I see you have yourself a charmer here," Gretchen said, with a laugh.

Kathryn stood back without moving, a slight look of bewilderment on her face. She looked at Chakotay, "I guess I do mom."

"Why don't we all go inside? Are you two, hungry? I can make you lunch. Or do you want to settle in first and have lunch in an hour or so?"

"How about we settle in first, then lunch, and after we can show Chakotay around the house," spoke Kathryn, casually glancing at Chakotay.

"That sounds fine with me," said Chakotay, not noticing Kathryn's befuddled look.

"Ok, well in about an hour I expect you both in my kitchen, ready to eat. Also, Kathryn, I fixed up the spare bedroom for the both of you. And don't act like you need separate rooms. I know better than that," Gretchen stated as she turned around, walked through the living room and disappeared into another room.

Kathryn and Chakotay glanced at each other while sporting looks of amusement.

Kathryn spoke first. "Let's go to the room so we can put our stuff away."

Chakotay nodded and followed her through the living room, up a flight of stairs, down a short hallway and to the first door on the left. The room was spacious and brightly lit. Most of the light came in from large windows on far wall. The bed was large and placed in the middle of the room. There wasn't much furniture other than nightstands, a dresser, and a rocking chair by the window. Chakotay observed that everything had a very antique feel. He found it so fascinating. Somewhat like stepping onto a holodeck program.

Chakotay was too busy analyzing the room he hadn't noticed Kathryn standing by the bed staring at him. He hadn't moved from the doorway and was still holding their bags.

"Quite a show you put on down there," Kathryn said, with a rather solemn expression.

"Oh, well, it just seemed right," Chakotay replied, as he shrugged.  _Is Kathryn bothered by what I did?_  He was rather confused.

"Well if you didn't win my mother over with that gesture, nothing will." Kathryn walked over to Chakotay, took both bags and placed them on the bed. She began to empty the contents of her bag. "It took you over seven years to ask me out on a date and kiss me. Five seconds with my mother and you're flirting away?!" The serious expression she wore was slowly replaced with a smirk and there was a flicker in her eyes.

Chakotay walked toward her, swaying his head, as he smiled. "You had me going there. I thought I had done something wrong."

"It's just pay back for earlier. Teasing me when I was frantic," she smiled, placing a kiss on his cheek.

They were both standing by the bed. Before she could step away, Chakotay grabbed her from the waist and held her close to him. He kissed her on the cheek, then on the lips. The longer they kissed, the more intensity there was between them. Kathryn fell onto the bed and Chakotay followed, landing on top of her gently. They kissed with more passion and desire as Chakotay ran his hand throughout Kathryn's hair. They stopped kissing and stared into each other's eyes as they lay side by side on the bed.

"No more teasing tonight, ok?" said Kathryn, smiling, while caressing his cheek.

"Agreed. But just for tonight," he said teasingly, as he grabbed her hand and placed several small kisses on the inside of her palm and down toward her wrist.

"We should probably head down for lunch before my mom comes looking for us."

Chakotay couldn't help but chuckle. "I definitely don't want to ruin my wonderful first impression."

They both sat up on the bed, their legs dangling down the side. Kathryn placed her arm around Chakotay's waist and rested her head against his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around her back and held her close.

"I love you," whispered Kathryn.

"I love you too."

=/\=

It was Christmas Eve. Kathryn and Chakotay had been in Indiana for three days. A lot wasn't planned for the day. Phoebe, her husband, and children were supposed to arrive after lunch time. Dinner was planned for 20:00 hours. They would open presents around midnight, if the children were still awake by then.

But as of right now, there was nothing immediate that needed taking care of. It was early morning and Chakotay and Kathryn lay in bed, under the covers, cuddled up against one another, enjoying the moment of silence. It had started snowing overnight. They could both see the treetops and fields covered in a layer of whiteness that ranged far beyond their vision. The coldness from outside was a nice contrast amongst the warmth between both their bodies.

They had been awake for over an hour and had yet to make it out of bed. They were both just too relaxed and content to want to leave the bed.

"Do you think we will have time to explore the snow later today? Just the two of us?" Chakotay asked quietly, as he placed small kisses against Kathryn's neck.

She closed her eyes to savor his warm, tender lips against her skin. She huddled her naked back closer to his warm, bare chest. "Hmmm…possibly. We always have tomorrow. The snow should be around for a couple days, I think."

Chakotay moved his hand from around Kathryn's chest and slowly placed it on her hip, then ran it down her smooth thigh. He kept rubbing her thigh as he spoke. "Only a week ago I was thinking we should take a trip somewhere to have fun in the snow."

"And by 'have fun in the snow' do you mean 'not leave the bedroom'?" Kathryn asked, as she turned around to face Chakotay.

"Well, if that's what you prefer…" Chakotay retorted, arching his eyebrow and smiling.

They both shared some more intense kisses that only managed to raise their body heat further. They remained with their legs intertwined, occasionally sharing small kisses, for a while longer.

"We should probably get up," said Chakotay.

"Coffee would be nice right now," Kathryn replied, softly.

Chakotay snickered. "I'm going to get jealous of your arduous affair with coffee. Coffee always manages to get in between us."

"Coffee and I go way back," Kathryn replied, while laughing.

"How about I make some breakfast to go along with that coffee? I don't think your mother is up. Maybe we can surprise her with breakfast for once instead of her surprising us."

"Sounds like a plan."

They both lazily got up from the bed. Kathryn put on her nightgown and robe, while Chakotay put on his pajama bottoms and long-sleeved shirt. They both headed downstairs to the kitchen.

=/\=

About thirty minutes after they had started preparing breakfast, Gretchen appeared in the kitchen.

"Well it seems some people fell out of bed today," she said, smiling.

"Good morning. We wanted to surprise  _you_  for once. Here take a seat," responded Chakotay, sliding out a chair from the table and escorting Gretchen to it.

They, well Chakotay, had made Belgium waffles while Kathryn sliced some bananas and made coffee. They had found some whipped cream in the refrigerator that would be a great topping for the bananas and waffles. They placed all the items on the table.

"Well, this smells marvelous. Who made the waffles?" asked Gretchen, casually glancing at Kathryn.

"You know very well I cannot produce waffles this great, mom," retorted Kathryn, frowning. "I did make the coffee, though."

"And the coffee tastes spectacular," said Chakotay, patting Kathryn's hand.

"So, what time is Phoebe supposed to arrive, mom?"

"I believe she said around 15:00. It should give Chakotay enough to get to know her before dinner. Have you warned him of her rather vivacious spirit?" asked Gretchen.

"Oh he knows. I've told him many stories."

Chakotay couldn't help but be amused. They were talking about him like he wasn't sitting one chair over.

They continued to eat breakfast while having light conversation. Once they were finished, Chakotay offered to clean up alone. Kathryn decided she would shower, while Gretchen needed to contact some friends.

As Kathryn and Gretchen walked out of the room, Gretchen whispered to Kathryn, while pointing her thumb toward the kitchen, "Sweetie, that man over there, he's a keeper."

Kathryn couldn't help the smile that spread across her face.

"I know."

=/\=

Kathryn and Chakotay had spent the time after breakfast adding the finishing touches to the Christmas decorations. When they had arrived days prior, Gretchen hadn't been able to decorate much of the house. In years past, she had only put up minimal adornments, mainly because she felt a sense of sadness and loneliness with her oldest daughter not around to celebrate with her and the rest of the family. However, this year was different. There was a lot to celebrate with Kathryn's safe return home.

Most people, who still chose to set up a tree for Christmas, typically chose a holographic tree or simply replicated one. Since Gretchen was quite traditional, she chose to have a freshly cut tree. A neighbor of hers usually cut one for her in years past, but this year Chakotay had offered to handle the task.

The day after their arrival, Chakotay and Kathryn had taken a walk to the nearby woods to find the perfect tree. Kathryn had assumed Chakotay would use a phaser to cut the tree down, but was quite surprised when he asked Gretchen if she had an ax. Kathryn knew he was very talented with his hands, in more ways than one, but he still surprised her with his unique talents. He had, in fact, built her a bathtub when they were on New Earth. That was a gesture she would never forget.

As Chakotay inspected the trees, Kathryn stood back and admired him. They had known each other for a long time and never did she imagine being this happy with him. Even though there was no such thing as perfection, he was perfect for her. He made her life a much more enjoyable place.

Kathryn was so lost in her thoughts she hadn't realized Chakotay was speaking to her.

"What?" She was slightly embarrassed. She hoped he hadn't caught her gazing at him.

Chakotay laughed. "I just said I think I found the tree. It's a perfect height, nice fullness, and will look marvelous in the living room."

"That's nice."

"Wow, I expected a bit more enthusiasm," Chakotay sarcastically replied.

"I'm sorry. I was just lost in my thoughts."

"I noticed. What were you thinking of?"

"Just things from the past. Nothing important really. So are you ready to cut it down?"

"I am. I suggest you move back. Don't want to have to call the Doctor to revive you in case you get knocked out by a falling tree. Plus, Gretchen will never forgive me," he stated, with a smirk.

"Funny." She rolled her eyes and moved to a safe distance.

Kathryn continued her quest of admiration. Chakotay was swinging the ax with full force, hitting the trunk of tree at a perfect angle every time. Even if he was wearing a coat, she could still see the definition of his muscles with every swing. Due to the way he was standing, she could also see his muscular thighs clench with every blow. Since Starfleet uniforms were not very forgiving, she had, on occasion, noticed his well-defined body, especially on those rare moments he only wore his undershirt. She continued to let her mind roam when all of a sudden she heard a loud crack and an even louder crash. The ear-splitting noises brought her back to reality.

Chakotay looked over at her with a giant grin on his face. She smiled back.  _He looks so proud of himself. It's quite endearing_. She had to suppress her laugh.

Chakotay was tying the tree up and setting it on some sort of apparatus to make the trip back to the house easier.

"What do you say we head back?" Chakotay asked, while standing by his tree.

Kathryn walked toward him with a smile. When she reached him, she wrapped her arms around his body and snuggled close to his chest, while looking up at him. He felt really warm against her body from all the exertion. She placed her hand on the back of his head, lowering it slightly, and placed a kiss on his moist lips.

Chakotay had been caught off guard by her spontaneous display of passion, but had no complaints. He placed his hands on her lower back and squeezed her gently toward him. She felt perfect in his arms.

They kissed for a while longer, while exploring each other's bodies with their hands. If it hadn't been broad daylight, and weren't expected back soon, they might have ended up picking off leaves and twigs from their hair and dusting off dirt from their naked bodies. They eventually broke apart and decided to head back. They walked side by side while dragging the tree back to the house.

=/\=

It was almost 15:00. Phoebe and her family were due at the Janeway residence any minute now. Gretchen was in the kitchen baking some goods for dinner and preparing some snacks for when the rest of her family arrived.

Kathryn and Chakotay sat on the couch drinking some coffee, while talking about nothing in particular. They had offered to help Gretchen in the kitchen, but she had refused. She wanted them to have some time to themselves before the arrival of the Chaotic Duo, Gretchen's endearing term for her grandsons.

Ten minutes after the designated arrival time, there was a knock at the door. Kathryn looked at Chakotay with a smirk, placed her hand on his knee, and said, "You ready? Let's see how quickly you can charm your way into Phoebe liking you."

Chakotay laughed. They both stood up from the couch and made their way to the front entrance. Kathryn opened the door and was immediately attacked with hugs by two small figures.

"Aunt Kathryn! I missed you"

"I missed her more!"

"No you didn't! You wanna see my new toy?!"

"No she doesn't! She wants to see my drawing!"

"Can we play in the snow?"

"Yes! Can we!? Pleeeeease!"

Both boys were talking so quickly and overlapping each other's speech, Kathryn could not quite decipher who said what. She had handled difficult species in the Delta Quadrant for seven years, but a couple of seconds with her nephews made those encounters seem like a piece of cake.

Andrew and Brian were six and four years old, respectively. They were precocious, highly active, and very talkative. There was one major distinction between the boys: Andrew had a great interest in literature and the arts, while Brian was fascinated by science, mainly space. Even though they had only known Kathryn for a couple of months, they were deeply enamored with their aunt. Especially Brian, who found her extremely fascinating since she had been lost in space for longer than he had been alive.

Once they let go of Kathryn, they noticed a figure standing behind her.

"Who is that?" asked Andrew, while pointing at Chakotay, frowning slightly.

Chakotay now realized why Gretchen called them the Chaotic Duo. Before he, or Kathryn, could answer, Phoebe broke the somewhat awkward moment.

"Boys! Give your Aunt Kathryn some time to breath. We talked about this before. She isn't going anywhere. You have time to talk to her the rest of the day and tomorrow. Now, let's go inside, take off our coats and settle in. Okay?"

"Okay…" said both boys in unison.

As they walked into the house, Andrew and Brian kept glancing over toward Chakotay, who had yet to move from his position. Phoebe and her husband, Michael, walked in after them.

"It's good to see you again my big sister. I've missed you."

Kathryn smiled and gave Phoebe a hug. "I've missed you too. At least we get to spend this holiday together. It's been some time, hasn't it?"

"Don't even remind me. Boys, why don't you go say hi to your Grandma. I'm assuming she's in the kitchen?" she asked, looking at Kathryn.

Kathryn nodded as she proceeded to give Michael a hug. She stepped back and noticed the couple standing there with an expression of curiosity on their faces. Kathryn realized she had yet to introduce Chakotay to them.

"Ugh…Phoebe, Michael, this is Chakotay," she said, while stepping closer to him and placing her hand on his arm.

Chakotay stepped forward and reached out his hand toward Phoebe. "I've heard a lot of about you and it is a pleasure to finally get to meet you in person." Chakotay produced a dimple heavy smile, while shaking Phoebe's hand.

"I guess being lost in the Delta Quadrant wasn't all that bad, right Kathryn?" said Phoebe, with a smirk.

Kathryn's face slowly turned a light shade of red.

Chakotay chuckled as he greeted Michael. Phoebe walked toward Kathryn while both men continued to talk.

Phoebe whispered, "Wow Kathryn, your first Christmas back and you bring a boy home. And may I add, what a handsome man he is."

"Phoebe!" Kathryn's voice was strained, as she tried to contain the volume but make an impact with her tone at the same time.

"You know I'm only teasing. It's my sisterly duty. Plus, I have seven years of catch up to make up for," Phoebe replied, with a quiet laugh. "But on a serious note, you do look radiant Kathryn," she said while placing her hands on Kathryn's shoulders and smiling. "You might have been happy when you returned home seven months ago, but right now I'm seeing a very different you. Honestly, I could not be any more delighted for my big sister."

Kathryn hugged Phoebe, but their tender moment was quickly brought to a halt when Andrew and Brian stormed back into the room, followed soon after by Gretchen.

"Mom! Dad! Grandma made brownies and she let us eat some," said Andrew.

The four adults turned toward the boys. Both of them had crumbs and chocolate smears surrounding their mouths. Gretchen wiped the boys' mouths clean when she finally reached them.

"Can we go play in the snow now, mom?" asked Brian. "We promise to behave."

"Maybe later kids. Mom and Dad want to talk to Aunt Kathryn and Chakotay."

"Chakotay?" asked Andrew.

"Chakotay is Aunt Kathryn's friend," said Phoebe. "He was also on  _Voyager_ when it was lost."

Chakotay couldn't help but glance at Kathryn and inwardly giggle at the term  _friend_. He then looked over at the boys and noticed a look of disappointment on their faces. In a moment of weakness Chakotay said, "I could take them out. It would give all of you time to talk and settle in. Plus I've wanted to check out the snow."

Phoebe slowly turned her head toward Chakotay with a look of utter disbelief. "Are you sure about that Chakotay? These two can be a handful."

"I'm positive. I spent a lot of time with my nephew a couple of months ago. He's about their age too. I've also been known to be great with kids and will also give me an opportunity to bond with them."

The boys were listening intently to their mother and Chakotay. They seemed to honestly not care who was going with them as long as they could play in the snow.

"What do you think Michael?" Phoebe asked her husband.

"I'm fine with the idea. I think the kids can learn a thing or two from Chakotay," said Michael, as he grinned.

Phoebe sighed deeply. "Ok boys, you two can go out in the snow with Chakotay, but you have to promise to be on your best behavior. Any sign of disobedience and inside for both of you."

The boys jumped up and down and ran to put on their coats. Kathryn walked over to Chakotay, who was about to get his own coat.

"Do I have to give you the same speech Phoebe just gave the boys?" Kathryn said, with a look of amusement.

Chakotay couldn't help but laugh. "Oh I promise not to misbehave,  _Admiral._ "

It was Kathryn's turn to laugh. "Oh, Chakotay, you always manage to amaze me. Maybe I can get away for a while and join you in a bit."

"I would love that," he said, placing a kiss on her lips.

They quickly broke apart when they heard Andrew say, "I thought you were friends? I didn't know friends kissed each other."

Both boys were standing in front of Kathryn and Chakotay, fully dressed for the snow, staring at them with quizzical looks.

"Um, well, you can say we are more than friends. So are you two ready for some fun in the snow?" Chakotay asked, trying to make the awkward moment disappear quickly.

The boys seemed to have forgotten about everything else when they heard the word 'snow.'

"If you don't hear back from me in an hour, send a search party," Chakotay whispered to Kathryn, as he winked at her and walked out of the door, closing it behind him.

=/\=

It had been over thirty minutes since Chakotay had left with the boys. Kathryn sat at the kitchen table with the rest of the family. They drank coffee and tea while munching on the snacks Gretchen had prepared earlier. Kathryn was too preoccupied to actually pay much attention to the discussion her mother and sister were having, but she didn't want to excuse herself from the table either. She wondered what the boys and Chakotay could be up to.

Phoebe was the first to notice her sister's distracted nature. She nudged her mother on the arm with her elbow and slightly moved her head toward Kathryn's direction. Gretchen immediately realized what Phoebe was motioning at. Both women smiled and noticed Michael smiling as well.

"Kathryn," said Phoebe, "why don't you check up on Chakotay and the boys? It's been some time since they left and I would not want to find Chakotay buried under a layer of snow."

"Are you sure? I don't want to just leave the conversation," replied Kathryn, softly.

"From what I've witness," Phoebe stated, "You really haven't been paying much attention to what we have been talking about."

"I guess I haven't."

"Just go, Kathryn. Chakotay will be happy to see you."

"I guess I'll go check up on them then. I'll be back soon." She said, as she got up from the table and walked out of the kitchen.

Kathryn put on her coat and scarf and made her way out the front door. She felt the frosty, cold air hit her warm cheeks as she walked down the front steps. She closed her eyes for a brief moment to adjust to the sudden change in temperature. Once she was standing on the walkway, she stopped to survey the area for any sign of the three. She didn't see or hear anything.

All of a sudden she heard a child's scream in the distance. Thinking the worst, Kathryn ran with strain, because of the thick layer of snow, toward the sound that had come from the right side of the house. When she reached the corner of the house, she saw Chakotay and the boys in the distance. He was lifting one of the boys in the air and twirling him around in circles. After going around a couple of times, he placed him down on the floor again. Then picked up the other boy and repeated the same process. There were some screams followed by giggles.

Kathryn hadn't moved as she watched the scene unfold. She couldn't help but get emotional. It was just such a wonderful sight to witness. The way the three of them were getting along made her smile.  _I guess everyone was right when they said Chakotay was good with kids_.

She continued to watch as Chakotay placed the second boy on the ground. She was too far away to hear what they were saying, when Andrew and Brian burst into laughter and both ran toward Chakotay, giving him a big hug. Since they were fairly short, they only managed to hug his legs. To accommodate their stature, Chakotay knelt on one knee. The boys reattached themselves to him, tying their arms around his neck and hugging him tightly. Chakotay wrapped his arms around the tiny bodies and returned the gesture.

Kathryn was lost in the moment. She couldn't help but swallow deeply and take a profound breath. She tried to fight off a couple of tears that had formed in her eyes.  _The cold breeze must be irritating my eyes_.

As she wiped a tear away, she noticed one of the boys waving at her. Chakotay turned to see who he was waving at and smiled when he noticed it was her. He waved her over. Kathryn slowly began walking to their location.

"Aunt Kathryn! Aunt Kathryn! Are you coming to join us?!" screamed Andrew, running toward her.

Brian followed suit. "We've been good Aunt Kathryn."

Both boys reached her half-way. They each took one of her hands and they all walked together toward Chakotay. He was now standing and beaming as he watched them make their way to him.

"Come to check up on me I see?" said Chakotay, placing a small kiss on her cheek.

"Somewhat. Phoebe suggested I come out here to see how everything was going."

"Well, everything is fine so far. These two are brilliant little kids," he replied as he put one hand on each of the boys' head and rubbed their hair around. Both boys giggled.

"Aunt Kathryn! Chakotay has been telling us stories. I really like them," said Andrew.

"Oh really," replied an amused Kathryn, "what kind of stories?"

"Stories about the angry warrior and the woman warrior," interjected Brian.

Kathryn couldn't help but laugh, while she casually glanced at Chakotay. He gave her a sheepish look.

"Oh I see…" answered Kathryn.

Chakotay had told her the legend of the angry warrior years before but she had never forgotten a single word. There were times when she would repeat them to herself in moments of brief despair and loneliness. They were words that brought comfort and optimism to her.

"The angry warrior and the woman warrior joined together to help each other make it back to their home that was very far way. They fought evil aliens that wanted to harm them," added Andrew."

"They also had a lot of friends that would help them fight these aliens," said Brian.

"Well these stories seem rather interesting. I think I'll have Chakotay tell me some of them later," she replied with a smile, returning to look at Chakotay. "So was the spinning in the air part of the stories?"

Before Chakotay could answer, Andrew interrupted. "No, he was showing us how warp speed feels like in space."

Kathryn couldn't help but giggle at the statement. Chakotay was now tugging at his ear trying to fight off a smile.

"I'm pretty sure that was an accurate portrayal. Did you enjoy it?"

"YES!" both boys replied together.

It had started to snow again. All four looked up at the sky. Andrew and Brian started running in circles around the couple. "I think we should head back inside. It's not snowing hard but it can increase at any moment," said Chakotay.

"I agree. Come on boys. Let's go inside. I'm sure grandma can prepare some hot chocolate for you to warm up."

The boys stopped running in circles, changed their course, and ran toward the house instead.

Kathryn reached for Chakotay's hand and squeezed it gently. "They really like you. They usually don't warm up to people that quickly. It took them a couple of visits before they called me Aunt Kathryn and hugged me willingly."

Chakotay looked at her and smiled. "I guess I just got lucky."

Chakotay gave Kathryn a gentle hug. Once he let go they started walking, hand in hand, toward the house, amidst the cascade of snowflakes.

=/\=

Dinner had been rather uneventful, but quite enjoyable. Gretchen had prepared the meal with some of Chakotay's help. Kathryn had previously informed her mother Chakotay was a vegetarian. Even though Chakotay said he wasn't bothered by other's eating non-vegetarian meals in front of him, Gretchen had opted for a meat-free meal.

She had made an abundance of sides, ranging from mashed potatoes to candied yams to string beans. Everyone enjoyed the meal greatly, especially since Gretchen was such a great cook.

As they ate, Andrew and Brian told their parents how much fun they had with Chakotay during the afternoon. The two were so excited they hardly ate since they were too busy re-telling some of the stories.

"Angry warrior and woman warrior?" asked Phoebe, glancing at Chakotay with an arched brow.

"Mom! It's not polite to interrupt," exclaimed Andrew, pouting, then continuing on with the story.

Chakotay was relieved he didn't have to explain his choice of words during dinner, but he knew very well he wasn't going to escape the rest of the night unscathed. He looked at Kathryn, who was sitting across from him, quietly giggling to herself.

By the time they had finished with the meal, Gretchen had brought out dessert: a freshly baked pecan pie. It smelled delectable and tasted even better. Chakotay hadn't enjoyed a slice of pie that much in a long time.

When they had all finished, Gretchen suggested they head on out to the living room while she cleaned up. Once again Chakotay offered to do the cleaning, but requested some help.

"How about Ensign Andrew and Ensign Brian help me clear up the table?" asked Chakotay, while looking at the boys.

Phoebe visibly rolled her eyes. She knew very well the boys would decline the offer since she pretty much had to hassle them to accomplish their daily chores.

"Okay Chakotay! We'll help," said Andrew, quite enthusiastically.

"Are we really Ensigns?" asked Brian, bemused.

"Well, you are honorary Ensigns," replied Chakotay, as he stood up, taking a couple of plates with him and walking toward the kitchen. Brian and Andrew followed with more of the dinner ware in hand.

Phoebe sat back with her mouth open and eyes wide. She still couldn't believe what had just transpired in front of her eyes. She looked over at Kathryn. "How committed is he to Starfleet Academy? I wouldn't mind having him at home controlling those two. I've never seen them agree to anything so quickly. Especially chores!"

Kathryn laughed, "I'm pretty sure he likes teaching, but you never know."

=/\=

Everyone sat in the living room while taking in the decorations surrounding them. It was still snowing outside. The soft falling flakes were visible from the living room window and added a calming effect to the special occasion. It had been an hour since dinner ended and they were still enthralled in conversation as they drank more coffee.

The boys wouldn't leave Chakotay's side since they had helped him clean. They were still quite excited and wanted him to play with them or tell them more stories. They had eventually calmed down and each boy sat on either side of him on the couch.

"I'm going to get jealous," said Kathryn, pretending to be hurt, as she sat next to them on the same couch.

"We love you too Aunt Kathryn, don't get jealous," said Andrew, as he slid closer to her and gave her a quick hug.

"I'm only kidding."

Everyone was quite relaxed and comfortable. It was rather silent, until a chorus of small snores filled the room. Andrew and Brian had fallen asleep on the couch; Andrew against Kathryn and Brian leaning on Chakotay.

"Well I guess they can open their gifts tomorrow morning," said Phoebe, as she stood up from the other couch.

"I'll take Andrew and you can take Brian," said Michael, as he gently lifted his son off of the couch.

Kathryn, Chakotay, and Gretchen watched as the couple carried their children to the bedroom that used to belong to Phoebe.

"You know, as much as I would like to stay and chat some more, I am actually quite tired. I think I will go to bed as well," Gretchen said, while standing up from her seat.

Kathryn and Chakotay both got up as well.

"Thank you Gretchen for a wonderful dinner. I haven't had a meal that delicious in a long time," said Chakotay.

"Oh Chakotay, you don't have to flatter me. I already like you," she said, as she gave him a hug.

"Oh no, I truly mean it. It's been a wonderful experience. Being able to spend the holidays with Kathryn and her family has meant a lot to me. You have made me feel very welcome."

Gretchen smiled, taken by his sincere words. "Thank you. I am truly glad you are enjoying yourself. Good night, Chakotay."

She moved to Kathryn. "Good night, sweetie. Sweet Dreams," she told her, as she walked out of the room.

Kathryn and Chakotay were alone for the first time in hours. They both sat back on the couch, close together, and Chakotay wrapped his arm around her, placing a kiss on her temple.

"Did you enjoy yourself today?"

"I did. You have a really wonderful family, Kathryn."

"I'm pretty lucky. I missed them so much while on  _Voyager_. I'm just delighted to be home again."

"This is the first time I'm celebrating Christmas in a traditional manner. I'm quite relishing the experience."

"You mean you've never celebrated Christmas?" Kathryn asked, quite surprised.

"Not really, no. My people don't celebrate this holiday, obviously. And when I was on Earth I just felt this time of year was the same as any other. I'm just glad to be celebrating with you for the first time."

They sat in silence awhile longer. It was already close to midnight. Phoebe and Michael had not returned and a good thirty minutes had already passed.

"I'm assuming they went to bed," said Kathryn, "we might as well do that too."

"Sounds like a wonderful idea because I get to spend more time  _alone with you_ ," whispered Chakotay in her ear.

They headed up the stairs to their bedroom. They changed into their sleepwear and got into bed, snuggling up against one another.

=/\=

Chakotay woke up before Kathryn. He wasn't quite sure what the time was, but he assumed it was rather early since the sun was barely coming in through the windows. He noticed it had stopped snowing overnight.

He had hidden Kathryn's gift in his duffle bag in one of the dresser drawers. They hadn't mentioned anything about exchanging gifts, but he knew that was part of the tradition. He wasn't expecting a gift from Kathryn; he just wanted to please her.

He slowly got out of bed and crept to the dresser. He made every effort not to make any noise as he opened the drawer. He pulled out the bag gently, opened it, and removed the small wrapped package from inside. He put that bag back inside the drawer and cautiously closed it. He realized he hadn't been breathing and let out a deep, quiet breath. He tiptoed back to the bed, placed the gift on the night stand, and made his way back under the covers trying not to disturb a still sleeping Kathryn.

Chakotay snuggled up against her, feeling her warm body against his. Every night they spent together, he was in awe at how beautiful she was and how passionate she could be. Such a different Kathryn from the one he met on  _Voyager_.

Kathryn began to stir. He placed a couple of kisses on her shoulder and slowly moved his way toward her neck.

"What time is it?" asked Kathryn, with a groggy voice.

"Not quite sure, but the sun is barely coming up," he said, as he rubbed her arm and added, "Merry Christmas, my love."

She turned toward him and smiled. "Merry Christmas to you too" and placed a kiss on his lips.

"I have something for you."

He reached over to the nightstand and grabbed the small package he had left there minutes before. It was wrapped in plain red paper with a thin white ribbon wrapped around it. He handed the box to Kathryn as she sat up in bed.

"Oh Chakotay, you didn't have to get me anything," she said, a smile forming on her face.

"I wanted to. I've had it for months actually. I figured I would find the perfect time to give it to you and what better time than now."

She undid the ribbon and slowly began to rip the paper off the package. She held the unwrapped box in the palm of her hand. When she removed the lid, she found a remarkable dark purple stone attached to a long chain. The stone was smooth, circular, and flat. She could see there were some carvings on the surface. She began to inspect the carvings on the stone and gasped when she recognized the writing.

"It's a quote from Dante…in Italian…" she said, in awe, while looking at him, tears making her eyes glisten. She read the quote, "'E quindi uscimmo a riveder le stele'…which roughly translates to…"

"'And we emerged to gaze upon the stars again'," Chakotay continued. "I thought it was fitting. Very similar to our journey on  _Voyager_ and our own friendship. We spent so much time in peril in the Delta Quadrant. There was always something dark and bleak trying to conquer us. We also had those moments where our friendship suffered because we weren't in agreement. But now…now we have the ability to enjoy our friendship. Our relationship. There's time and tranquility to enjoy the stars. We have the peace we didn't have before."

"Chakotay…this is beautiful. I don't know what to say."

She wrapped her arms around his neck and brought him in for a deep kiss. A couple tears streaming down her face.

She put the chain around her neck. "It's just perfect. This stone is beautiful. I've never seen anything like it."

"It's from Trebus. I found it at the bottom of the lake while swimming one day. I always thought it would make a great gift for you. I polished it and had it engraved before we left. I wanted to do it myself but it was rather difficult since it's quite small."

"I love it and thank you," she said, placing another kiss on his lips. "I also have something for you."

She reached over to her night stand and opened the drawer. She pulled out a rectangular shaped object wrapped in green paper. She handed it to him.

"Merry First Christmas Chakotay."

He looked at her as he took the package. He slowly slid his fingers through the slits of the paper to unwrap it. He really didn't know what to expect from Kathryn. When the paper was removed he held in his hands a book.

"Zefram Cochrane's  _The Potential of Warp Propulsion_ ," he read. "Where did you find this?! It's so hard to find this book in print!" exclaimed Chakotay, while flipping through the pages.

"In a small antique shop in San Francisco. I found it months ago, actually. I remember you mentioning it once on  _Voyager_  and when I found a hard copy, I thought of you immediately. At the time we hadn't spoken to each in months, but I think I unconsciously bought it as a potential ice breaker. I'm just glad I was able to give it to you under better circumstances," she said, smiling.

"Oh Kathryn, I love you so much," Chakotay said, as he placed the book on the nightstand and moved closer to her. He wrapped his arms around her body and gently held her close to him.

"I love you too"

They spent the rest of the morning making passionate love until it was time to get up and meet the rest of the family for Christmas morning breakfast.


	7. Chapter 7

**February 2379**

Chakotay sat in his office contemplating what he could do with his time. He had already managed to prepare a month worth of lesson plans, added the finishing touches to his paper, had office hours with several students, and read a couple of research articles on paleontology.

It was still too early to go home.

Kathryn had been away for a week on her first assignment as an Admiral. She, along with a few other admirals, had been sent to Deep Space Seven to delegate with a new species of aliens that wanted to join the Federation. This was the first time Chakotay and Kathryn had spent so much time apart since November.

Kathryn had left five days ago and Chakotay had managed to accomplish quite a bit, since he had a lot of extra time on his hands. He didn't have someone to meet up after work for coffee, he didn't have someone to go out to dinner with, and he didn't have someone to share the bed with and talk into the early hours of the morning. He missed her greatly, but at least she would be back in two more days. He could survive a few days longer. Chakotay didn't even want to contemplate what he would do if she were sent on a longer mission.

He had spent most of his week at the Academy. Being at home made him think too much of her, since she had left personal items all over his apartment. In the couple of months together she had managed to leave extra uniforms and nightgowns, along with some perfume and hairbrushes, and stacks of books. Her scent even lingered on the pillow she used when she slept over, which made it more difficult for Chakotay to sleep at night.

He sat at his desk tapping the glass top with his fingertips and looking around the room for something else to occupy his time, when he remembered a book Tom had mentioned to him a couple of weeks before. Tom had thought Chakotay would enjoy the reading because it dealt with Earth holiday customs from the 19th through 21st century. Chakotay figured he might as well give the book a chance. It was still better than sitting alone in his office staring at a wall.

He pulled up the book on a PADD, ordered some tea from the replicator, and headed toward the couch in his office. He began to skim the book for possible topics of interest. The text was neatly organized by months, with each month describing customs in different cultures. Tom had been right, the information was rather interesting. He perused through the text until he reached February. Chakotay couldn't help but chuckle while reading about Groundhog Day. "If a groundhog emerges from his burrow and sees its shadow, it is believed six more weeks of winter weather will continue," Chakotay read. He made a mental note to ask Kathryn if she ever heard of said celebration. Chances were she did since her parents were quite the traditionalists.

Chakotay continued reading until he reached Valentine's Day. He had vaguely heard of this festivity before, but was unaware of the practice behind it because it was hardly celebrated in the 24th century. Even though it was rooted in historical significance, the holiday had developed into a day of celebrating romantic love. Chakotay continued to read and found that, despite the celebration being turned into a commercialized event, it was still rather interesting.

"Valentine's Day was celebrated annually on February 14," Chakotay read. Coincidentally it was the same day as Kathryn's return.

Chakotay sat on the couch letting his mind wander for a bit. He eventually stood up and made his way to his desk. He researched Valentine's Day a little further and decided it would be the perfect way to welcome Kathryn home.

=/\=

The two days had passed quickly and Chakotay grew even more excited with every passing minute. He had talked to Kathryn briefly earlier in the morning. She told him the transport ship taking her back to Earth was expected to arrive around 17:00. She sounded tired and seemed as if she wanted to head home and relax once she arrived. Chakotay had suggested she head to his apartment instead and he would prepare dinner for her. She agreed without needing much convincing.

Kathryn was expected to arrive any minute now. Chakotay had spent all afternoon making sure all the details were in order and getting everything in place. He had spent hours researching customs and replicating the items necessary to make the occasion just right. He couldn't help but think how lucky he was to no longer have to save up his replicator rations to obtain all the items he needed. If he were still on  _Voyager_ , he was certain he would be eating Neelix's cooking for at least two months. He shuddered at the thought.

Chakotay was busy setting the table when the chime to his door rang. He grabbed an item from a nearby table and took it with him as he quickly walked to the door. Before he opened it, he straightened out the dark red tie he wore with his black slacks and black button down shirt. Apparently, he had read, red was the color largely associated with the holiday. He took a deep breath, he held the item behind his back with one hand, and opened the door with the other.

Kathryn stood in the hallway looking rather exhausted. She had placed one arm on the door frame to hold herself up. Her eyes were closed as she tried to stifle some yawns. She had dark circles under her eyes and looked quite pale. He hadn't seen her looking this tired since  _Voyager_. Once she heard the opening of the doors, she slowly opened her eyes. Her demeanor changed immediately when she saw Chakotay standing in front of her.

"Chakotay," she gasped, "you look so…handsome."

The paleness of her skin was replaced by a pink flush that raced from her to neck to the rest of face. Her eyes were wide with awe and she no longer looked exhausted. Her curiosity had been peaked.

Chakotay reached out his hand behind his back and handed her a gorgeous long stemmed red rose.

"Happy Valentine's Day Kathryn," he replied, with a genuine smile that made his dimples even more pronounced than usual.

"Happy what?!" she asked, with a confused expression, while taking the flower from him and smelling the sweet scent.

"Valentine's Day. It's an old Earth tradition meant to celebrate love and romance. It was celebrated every year on February 14th, which is today," he said, with the smile still plastered on his face.

A smile spread on her face and her brows furrowed. "Oh, Chakotay. How long have you been planning this and where did you get the idea? I'm certain this isn't part of your lectures or part of the research associated with your paper."

"Well, to be honest, it came to me to two days ago while reading a book Tom suggested about old Earth customs."

"Of course…Tom."

Chakotay couldn't help but laugh. "Would you like to come in? I'm sure we can celebrate in the hallway but I don't think that's very comfortable."

Kathryn gave him a smirk as she walked past him and entered the apartment. Chakotay took her duffle bag and set it on the floor near the couch. Before she could continue into the room, Chakotay got hold of her arm and gently pulled her back toward him and held her close.

"I missed you," he whispered in her ear, as he gently moved her hair away from her neck. He placed a small, warm kiss on the exposed skin.

She couldn't help but let a whispery moan escape from her mouth as the pleasant sensation sent a chill through her body.

"I missed you too," she barely breathed, as she pressed her lips against his.

They continued kissing and their lips soon parted as the intensity grew between them. Their warm tongues connected and a rush of warmth raced through their bodies. They eventually parted, breathing heavily and staring lovingly into one another's eyes. As much as she wanted to continue their forage in the bedroom, her curiosity was intrigued by the holiday.

"So tell me a little bit more about this holiday," Kathryn said, her breathing still somewhat uneven.

"I don't have to tell you. You shall experience it tonight," he replied, with a wink.

Chakotay took her hand and led her to the dinner table. Kathryn noticed the lighting to the room was dimmer than usual. Once she looked at the table she was in awe at the setup. It was very reminiscent of their dinners on  _Voyager_. The table was draped with a white table cloth and a red table runner through the middle. There was a large glass vase in the center of the table with more red roses. A couple of rose petals had been strewn all over. Around the vase were several lit candles of various sizes. The crystal dinner ware, which Kathryn has never seen before, was already placed on the table and a red napkin was folded into a fan shape and placed inside the wine glass. There was a bottle of wine already on the table.

Kathryn could not help but laugh internally at how over the top this holiday appeared, especially the small details, like the rose petals. However, she found everything so adorable, mainly because Chakotay had put so much thought and effort into surprising her. She couldn't help but smile at his gesture. She definitely had not expected to arrive to this when she arrived home.

Chakotay pulled out her chair and motioned for her to sit. As she sat down she noticed a scroll wrapped in a red ribbon on her dinner plate.

"What's this?"

"That's your Valentine."

"My what?"

"Your Valentine."

"Care to elaborate?"

"I think it's self-explanatory once you open it."

"Okay. So can I open it now?"

"If you like."

Kathryn stared at Chakotay for a second with a blank stare. He knew perfectly well her interest would not allow her to wait to open the scroll later. She slowly untied the ribbon, while casually glancing at him with her every move. He silently sat and watched her with a small smile on his face.

She unrolled the scroll. Inside contained a hand written message. She read it out loud.

_Kathryn,_

_You helped me find peace within. I will love you, now and forever._

_Happy Valentine's Day,_

_Your Not-So-Angry Warrior_

Kathryn looked up at Chakotay, who was still looking at her. The words were simple but heartfelt. She felt the tears starting to well in her eyes.

"That's beautiful Chakotay," were the only words she managed to respond with.

"I'm glad you liked it," Chakotay said, his voice almost inaudible. He cleared his throat, "So are you ready for dinner?"

Kathryn nodded, as she gave him a smile. She watched as Chakotay walked toward the kitchen. As soon as he disappeared, she let out a heavy breath. This was all very romantic. She couldn't help but think how lucky she was to have someone in her life like Chakotay. He went to extremes to please her and make her happy. She sat back in her chair to wonder what else he had up his sleeve this evening.

Chakotay exited the kitchen with two small plates. He had made Cesar salads. He placed her plate in front of her and kissed her on the cheek. Chakotay leaned over, picked up the bottle of wine, uncorked it and poured both of them some wine.

Once they had finished with their starter, Chakotay produced the entrée: spinach and cheese ravioli with marinara sauce. Kathryn soon learned Chakotay had, in fact, made them all by himself.

"You made these?!" Kathryn exclaimed, with a look of disbelief.

"I did. I replicated the ingredients but I put it all together myself. It was a long process but very worth the time and effort. Especially since it was for you," he replied, smiling.

"Well, I am going to request this every single week from now on. They are fabulous. I haven't had a meal this delicious in a long time."

Their conversation jumped from Chakotay's ability to cook to his research paper to Kathryn's diplomatic mission and somehow ended back on the topic of food. By that time they had finished their dinner and the entire bottle of wine.

"If you are ready for dessert, you can take a seat on the couch and I will deliver it shortly," said Chakotay, standing from the table.

Kathryn walked toward the couch and sat down. Between the filling meal and the wine she was having a hard time keeping her eyes open. In the past week she had only managed to sleep very few hours every night. She observed as Chakotay walked out with a small plate on one hand and a bottle of champagne and two champagne flutes intertwined in his fingers, in the other.

"For dessert we have chocolate covered strawberries and champagne."

He poured the champagne into the glasses and handed one to Kathryn. He sat down right next to her and wrapped his arm around her shoulder and placed a kiss on her temple. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the gesture. She loved it when he did that. He put his glass down and turned toward her. He gently placed his hand on her chin and held it there.

"Kathryn, I love you. I have loved you for a very long time. I cannot express how you have made my life better and you will continue to do so for a very long time. You are my one in a million," and with that he placed a passionate kiss on her lips.

"I love you too, Chakotay," Kathryn responded once their lips parted. "Tonight has been wonderful. Beyond what I ever expected and I appreciate everything you do to make my life a better and happier place."

They kissed again and leaned back on the couch.

"Would you like a strawberry?" Chakotay offered.

"Maybe in a little bit. I'm still savoring your meal," Kathryn said with a laugh.

"How about some music?"

"That sounds marvelous."

"Computer, play Classical Playlist Two, low volume," Chakotay instructed. He wrapped his arm around Kathryn once again and let her snuggle against his broad chest.

"So what other old Earth customs can we celebrate where we get to eat and drink," Kathryn asked, inquisitively.

Chakotay began to tell her in detail about the holidays he found interesting and the ones he found rather odd. Then he remembered about Groundhog Day.

"Kathryn, have you ever heard of Groundhog Day?"

He was met with silence, other than the music playing in the background. He looked down at Kathryn and noticed she had fallen asleep against his chest. He couldn't help but smile at how beautiful she looked. He tried to sit as still as possible trying not to disturb her. He knew she was tired and needed to rest. His plans for the rest of the evening could wait for tomorrow.

Once she had been asleep for almost an hour, he decided to slowly slither his way out from under her and gently place her on the couch, putting a pillow under her head. He went to the bedroom and grabbed a blanket to cover her with.

He cleaned up the table and put everything away. When he was finished he walked over to her and gently rubbed her shoulder. He didn't want her to sleep on the couch all night. Also, he didn't want to spend another night alone in the bed.

"Kathryn," he whispered, gently.

Kathryn's eyelids fluttered lightly. "Hmmmm…?" was her groggy response.

"Let's go to bed. You'll be a lot more comfortable."

"Mmm hmmm…"

When she didn't move, he gently placed his arms underneath her and picked her petite frame off of the couch. Chakotay was surprised Kathryn did not wake up.  _She must be really exhausted_.

He made his way to the bedroom and placed her carefully onto the bed. He removed her shoes and covered her with the blanket. He got ready for bed and climbed into bed next to her. He missed her presence next to him at night. It felt so good to wrap his arm around her body and feel her warmth against him.

Chakotay felt relaxed. He had not felt relaxed all week. Within minutes he had fallen asleep and slept the entire night without disruption.


	8. Chapter 8

**April 2379**

Kathryn waited anxiously near Chakotay's lecture hall. She had been waiting for close to ten minutes, while pacing back and forth. She was close enough to have a clear view of the exit of the building, but far enough for him not to immediately detect her when he left.

There were only a couple more minutes left before his class was over. She knew he walked directly to his office after every lecture on Thursday, got his belongings, and went directly to meet her at the café by Headquarters.

Today was going to be different.

Since November, the only outing they had managed to go on together was their trip to Indiana for Christmas. Sure they went to dinner, or concerts, or the theater in San Francisco, but they had never gone away for the weekend, just the two of them.

Their schedules were so busy; they just didn't have the time, or energy, to plan a trip. It always bothered Kathryn they had never managed to spend time alone in the snow in Indiana or head out to Lake Tahoe, like Chakotay had mentioned to her before. He always put so much thought into making her happy, or going out of his way to be romantic, she figured it was time for her to reciprocate.

She noticed the door to the building open. Chakotay exited with three cadets following him. They appeared to be quite enthralled in their conversation. Kathryn hesitated for a minute.  _Maybe I should meet him at his office instead_.  _I don't want to interrupt when he's with his students._ She thought about it a second or two before deciding to walk toward the group. She paced her steps accordingly in order to intercept with them at the same time.

Chakotay was so busy trying to make his way to his office, while answering the cadets' questions, he hadn't noticed Kathryn until he nearly stumbled over her.

"Admiral Janeway? What are you doing on Academy grounds?" asked Chakotay, slightly confused.

"Oh, just visiting a pal. How are you  _Professor_  Chakotay?" she replied, smiling mischievously and raising an eyebrow.

Noting her flirtatious manner, Chakotay moved in a little closer to her, grinning widely. "I'm doing perfectly fine,  _Admiral_."

The three cadets, who had stopped dead in their tracks along with Chakotay, looked at each other uncomfortably. If they hadn't known there was something going on between their Professor and Admiral Janeway, they certainly did now. The sexual tension between the two was almost visible. They didn't know whether to stay or leave.

The cadets glanced at each other awkwardly until one of them said, "Professor Chakotay, we can continue this discussion next week in class, if that's OK with you?"

Chakotay, remembering he had been speaking to some students, turned around immediately and tried to suppress his look of embarrassment. He always tried to be discreet on Academy grounds when it came to his relationship with Kathryn, but the sight of her made him forget his own guidelines.

"Of course. That will do just fine. I'll see you in class next week." He tried to sound as serious as possible without coming off too harsh. He then lightened his tone and added, "Have a good weekend you three."

The cadets smiled awkwardly and walked away as quickly as possible. Chakotay turned around to face Kathryn again. She had a smirk on her face.

"We really need to be more careful around my students."

" _We?_  I didn't do anything wrong."

" _Professor_  Chakotay? And that smile?"

"Well I can't help it if I smile when I see you."

"That was no ordinary smile, Kathryn."

"Yours wasn't either."

Chakotay sighed. With everything going on he had just realized he never got a straight answer from Kathryn as to why she was at the Academy.

"Kathryn, why are you here? Not that I'm complaining, but I thought I was meeting you at the café?"

"Change of plans."

"Don't tell me they are sending you on another mission," Chakotay said, frowning while his shoulders slouched just a tad. "How long? Please don't tell me it's more than a week."

Kathryn laughed, "No. Not this time. This is much better. Let's go to your office so you can get what you need and we can be on our way."

"Our way to where?" Chakotay asked.

"You shall see," she replied, smiling.

They both walked to his office. Chakotay knew better than to continue to question her. In all the years they had known each other, he had never met anyone more stubborn than Kathryn. He knew trying to get any more details out of her was going to be an impossible task.

=/\=

The lake was a gorgeous shade of blue. The slowly setting sun glistened on the surface of the water. The entire area was quiet and seemed so peaceful.

Chakotay stood near the edge of the lake staring off into the distance. Kathryn approached him from behind and wrapped her arm around his waist and snuggled against his chest. He hugged her in return.

"It's gorgeous, isn't it?" she asked.

"It is. The holodeck didn't do it justice. But then again we did have a moonlight sail. There wasn't much to see."

"That's true. Holodecks are amazing but they can never quite capture all the beauty and perfection of the real thing."

They both continued to watch as the sun vanished behind the tree tops in the distance. They held each other close for a while longer as it got darker and cooler.

"Maybe we should go inside. It's getting chilly and hard to see," said Kathryn.

"I agree. Is there a fireplace in the cabin? Since you haven't let me go inside yet."

"There is. It's very rustic. And I didn't let you go inside because I wanted to make sure the place was perfect before you got to see it."

Chakotay smiled. He enjoyed Kathryn's spontaneity. He also loved how she was willing to take a day off work to spend the rest of the weekend with him. That was something she normally didn't do. She always placed work above her personal life. It was nice to see her allow for some flexibility.

They walked toward the cabin that was nestled in between some very tall trees. It was quaint, quiet, and away from any other cabins. I wasn't close to the shore, but close enough to enjoy the view from the large porch.

When they entered, Chakotay could not help but think of Trebus and the cabins he had grown up in. There was a small living room, a kitchen with dining room, and two doors down a hallway. He assumed one was a bedroom and the other a bathroom. The cabin wasn't very big but it was just the perfect fit for the two of them. He couldn't wait to spend the next couple of days in Kathryn's company, relaxing.

"Kathryn, this is perfect. How did you find this place?"

Kathryn was busy preparing something in the kitchen and responded without turning around. "My parents, Phoebe, and I would stay in a cabin similar to this not far from here during the summer. The only difference is that cabin was a bit larger."

Kathryn wasn't one to spend a lot of time in the kitchen, unless it was to prepare coffee. Chakotay wondered what she was up to.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm preparing dinner."

"Oh…" said Chakotay. He had noticed the cabin did not come equipped with a replicator.

"Don't worry. I'm not actually cooking. I replicated food before leaving and there's enough for tonight and tomorrow morning. I'm just warming some stuff up. I had everything, the food and our bags, sent over beforehand. We can get fresh fruits and vegetables from a nearby farmer's market or the town after that."

Chakotay laughed. "I wasn't worried about your cooking. I just wanted to know what you were up to."

"Of course," she replied, as she glanced over her shoulder, raising an eyebrow and pouting. "Well, dinner is ready."

Kathryn gathered two large bowls from the kitchen counter and placed them on the dining room table. She returned to the kitchen and came out with a platter and set it next to the bowls.

"For dinner we have tomato soup, grilled cheese sandwiches, and a salad. The salad has candied pecans, blue cheese crumbles, and strawberries. See, simple. Can't burn simple," she smiled at Chakotay, while he sat down at the table.

"Everything looks delicious," he said, serving himself from the bowls and platter onto his own plate.

Kathryn brought out a bottle of wine and poured Chakotay a glass. She then poured herself one.

"No one ever said you cannot have wine with grilled cheese sandwiches," she stated, while laughing and taking a sip from her glass.

They ate their dinner while Chakotay told her about his recent lecture. His last lecture was about the  _Equinox_  incident, which explained why the cadets had so many questions for him after class.

Kathryn listened intently without saying much. What happened with the  _Equinox_  crew was something she wasn't proud of, especially because it had put such a drift between their friendship. But they had always managed to solve their differences, no matter how serious the incident. Kathryn shook her head as she tried to push her thoughts aside. Those were things she did not want to be thinking about right now.

Chakotay noticed her quiet, far away demeanor. "I'm sorry Kathryn. I really shouldn't have brought up the  _Equinox_."

"No, that's fine. It happened. Something I'm not proud of, but it happened."

They sat in silence for a while until Kathryn began to tell him about some changes at Headquarters.

By the time they had both finished eating dinner, they still had some wine left. Chakotay filled the rest of her glass, then his. He picked up the plates and placed them on the kitchen counter.

"How about I try to get a fire started? It's getting cooler in here and I think we might need the warmth."

Kathryn smiled, "That sounds lovely."

They both got up from the table. Kathryn walked to the couch with her wine glass and sat down. Chakotay followed, but headed toward the fireplace instead. He placed a couple logs inside and within minutes, and very little effort, he had started a fire.

He made his way to the couch to join her. They snuggled up against one another. The fire was barely starting to grow but Kathryn could already feel the warmth on her face.

"I was going to offer you some of my hair to start the fire, but I see you didn't need it this time," Kathryn teased.

Chakotay tried to feign irritation but wasn't successful as a laugh escaped his pursed lips.

"You will never let that go, will you?"

"I just found it cute you struggled in starting a fire. Well, initially I was just worried about the safety of the crew and getting our ship back. I didn't find it cute until days later when we were safely back on  _Voyager_  and I replayed the events in my head as I tried to go to fall asleep every night."

Chakotay didn't want to think about the past right now. Especially with moments that could have had very different outcomes. They had been lucky to have survived so many hostile encounters but this wasn't a moment to be reminiscing about them

"Kathryn, why did you decide to do this? Taking a day off work is quite a feat for you," Chakotay asked, quietly.

Kathryn took the final sip of her wine and set the glass on the table. She looked at Chakotay with a somewhat serious expression.

"I just wanted to repay you for everything you do for me and what you have done for me in the past. I don't think I ever thanked you for talking reason into me on so many occasions." She paused and stared into the fire. She didn't move her gaze as she continued to speak. "You always put me in front of your needs and I wanted to do the same for you once. You are very understanding when it comes to work and I just wanted to show you that I can set that aside at times."

She continued to stare at the fire as Chakotay observed her. She was fighting very hard to hold back her emotions, even if her voice was starting to crack.

"Kathryn…you don't have to do these things for me. I love you regardless. You know that."

"I know. But I wanted to. I wanted to come back to Lake George with you and experience what we couldn't before. What protocols didn't allow us to have."

Chakotay moved closer to Kathryn and wrapped his arm tighter around her. "Well, we are here now and we have several days to enjoy each other's company without any interruptions. Anything special you want to do while we are here?"

Kathryn finally took her eyes off of the flames and looked at Chakotay. "I would love to go sailing again. But when it's not so dark, we don't have safety protocols to protect us," she said, as she managed to produce a slight grin.

Feeling the mood lighten, Chakotay replied, "Oh! Are you worried about my sailing capabilities?"

"Well, if you sail the same way you pilot a shuttle craft…" she said, casually glancing his way.

"You are terrible. And I love you for it!"

Chakotay moved in even closer to Kathryn began to gently attack her with kisses on her neck and face and any other area there was visible skin. Kathryn's giggles could be heard from outside of the cabin long into the night.

=/\=

The next morning they both woke up on the couch. They had spent most of the night talking and eventually fell asleep, comforted by the flames of the fire.

Kathryn was lying partly on Chakotay's chest. When she got up, he groaned as he slowly tried to sit up. He hadn't slept on a couch in quite some time, especially with someone else. He had forgotten how uncomfortable it could be.

"Remind me never to do that again," he said.

"That makes two of us. My arm is asleep," Kathryn replied, while shaking her right arm.

"Tonight we sleep in the bed."

"Oh, you plan on sleeping tonight?" she said, as she winked at him.

Chakotay made his way toward her and kissed her on the lips. "Whatever else you want to do in bed besides sleeping is fine by me."

She smiled in return and patted him on the chest. "So, should we have breakfast? We can head to the farmer's market to pick up more food or we can go into town after that."

"That sounds like a great idea."

They both made their way to the kitchen. Kathryn pulled out some food from the fridge and a nearby cupboard.

"We have an assortment of fruits, muffins, and some juice."

Kathryn picked up a strawberry from the fruit bowl and took a bite out of it. Chakotay watched her as she savored every bite, leaving a red tint on her lips. He found her irresistible. He leaned in for a kiss which caught Kathryn off guard, but she reciprocated. He could taste the strawberry in her mouth, which only made him want to kiss her more. They passionately kissed, until they had moved against the fridge.

"What if….we eat….breakfast…in bed," she whispered, in between deep breaths.

"I love that idea," replied Chakotay, in between a kiss, his hand moving down her body.

They continued kissing with ardor as they clumsily made their way down the hallway and into the bedroom, never letting their lips part. Their breakfast items forgotten in the kitchen.

=/\=

Kathryn and Chakotay eventually ended up having breakfast a lot later than they had expected. It was practically considered lunch by now. But they didn't care. They had enjoyed their morning together instead. They didn't have a strict schedule to follow, which made the weekend a lot more enjoyable.

"What if we go for our sail once we finish eating? It might be too cold and dark if we decide to go later," Kathryn suggested.

"I think that sounds like a great plan. You have a lot of great ideas today," Chakotay responded, with a smile and a raised brow.

Kathryn couldn't help but chuckle. "It must be the surroundings, it allows for my creativity to flow."

Once they had finished breakfast and changed into different clothes, they headed outside. It was quite sunny and slightly warmer than they had expected. Nevertheless, they still wore their jackets. They had taken blankets and pillows with them because they needed some comfort in the wooden boat and it was always cooler when surrounded by water. Plus, the weather was always unpredictable.

They walked toward the dock, which had a boat tied to it. The boat belonged to the cabin owners and anyone who stayed at the cabin was allowed to use it.

They walked to the edge of the dock. Chakotay held Kathryn's hand as she stepped in and took a seat. Chakotay untied the boat from the dock, climbed in after her, and sat down.

Chakotay took hold of the oars. "Are you ready to depart, Captain?"

Kathryn couldn't help but laugh. "Aye aye, Commander! Set a course for peace and tranquility."

Chakotay chuckled and he began to move the oars. He loved when Kathryn let her guard down and joked around with him. In the past couple of months he had really gotten to know her better and he loved this side of her. A very different Kathryn from _Voyager_  days.

After rowing for some time, Chakotay stopped. They had traveled the entire time in silence. They were quite a distance from the shore and they were surrounded by just water and trees in the distance. It was so much more beautiful in person. He was so glad he was here again with Kathryn.

"Are you ok with stopping here for a bit?" he asked her.

"This is perfect. It's so quiet which makes me feel so relaxed. I'm almost certain I could fall asleep right now."

Chakotay grabbed the blankets they had brought and spread them on the floor of the boat. He got the pillows and placed them by the seat, producing a makeshift bed. Kathryn watched him as he worked.

"Come join me," he said as he sat down, patting the floor of the boat.

Kathryn slowly crawled over to his side. It was a lot more comfortable than she expected. She snuggled up against him, while he placed an arm around her.

Kathryn couldn't remember a time when she felt this serene. She always felt at peace with Chakotay, but there was always something on the back of her mind, usually work related. Being away from the city and work made her forget her responsibilities for a while. Her thoughts were interrupted when Chakotay spoke.

"I can't help but think about the last time we were sailing on this lake," he said.

"I know. Very different times. I like this version better."

"Me too," he replied, with a laugh.

They sat in silence, while holding each other. The breeze was starting to get cooler. Chakotay grabbed another blanket and draped it over their bodies.

"This is perfect," she said, while patting Chakotay on the thigh.

"It is. I wish we could stay here forever."

"Me too."

"You know, we can try to do this more often when we get home. We don't have to necessarily go away for several days. We can just get away for a day. Go wine tasting in Napa or find a bed and breakfast in Santa Barbara. Nothing fancy. Just something to allow us get away from everyday stress," said Chakotay, placing a kiss on Kathryn's forehead.

There was a long pause until Kathryn spoke.

"I've been thinking about something, Chakotay."

She took another long pause. Chakotay wasn't sure if he should wait for her to continue speaking or ask her what she was thinking. When Kathryn was having difficulty explaining herself, there was usually a larger matter at hand. He was about to say something when she began to speak again.

"Something has been on my mind for some time now…" she paused again, "…I just don't know how you would feel about it, but…what if we move in together?"

Chakotay was hit with a rush of emotions. For a moment he was starting to think something terrible was about to come out of her mouth. But hearing her say she wanted to move in together filled him with joy. These were thoughts he had for a very long time. Obviously, he never spoke them out loud. He figured there would eventually come a time where it was appropriate to bring this matter up. He realized he had been quiet for too long and didn't want to give Kathryn the wrong impression.

"Yes. I think that's a wonderful idea," he replied, enthusiastically, placing a kiss on her temple.

"You do?" she asked, looking up at him, contentment all over her face.

"Of course. It's something that I've always thought about. We spend practically every night together. It would be easier for us both."

"Why didn't you bring it up before?"

"I just wanted you to be ready. If it were up to me, we would have moved in together after our first date."

Kathryn laughed, "Well, I guess now we decide where we are going to live: my place or yours?"

"About that...what if we look for a different place. A place that's new to the both of us. Make it our own."

"I like that idea," she said, placing a kiss on his cheek. "So I guess when we get back to San Francisco we have some searching to do."

They lay in the boat for a while longer, enjoying the surroundings. Chakotay was beyond happy. There was nothing that could have possibly made this weekend any better for him. He couldn't wait to get back to the city to start their new chapter together.


	9. Chapter 9

**May 2379**

"Where should we start unpacking? The kitchen? The bedroom?" Chakotay asked, as he looked around the living room full of plastic storage containers.

Kathryn was standing in the middle of the same room holding a stack of books in her hands. She glanced from one side of the room to the other looking exasperated.

"I honestly don't know," she replied, sighing deeply.

Chakotay noted her frustration. It had been a couple of long, arduous days for the both of them. Headquarters had sent Kathryn on an emergency mission just five days prior to their move-in date. Chakotay had assured Kathryn he could take care of all the packing while she was gone. However, he had been asked by the Academy to fill in for another Professor who needed to take a short leave of absence. This meant he was at the Academy twice as long during the week and left with very little time to pack. When Kathryn returned one day before their move in date, they scurried to pack all their belongings. They had hardly slept and were running out of energy.

"You know, we really don't need to start unpacking right away. We can just unpack the essentials and do everything else slowly," Chakotay suggested.

"I guess we could, but everything is a mess!"

"Well, it's our mess, in our house. We aren't expecting visitors and don't have to impress anyone. Why don't we get something to eat, then come home, sit outside on our patio, and enjoy our Saturday afternoon and rest. We can unpack tomorrow."

Kathryn looked around the room some more, not fully convinced by Chakotay's idea. She eventually put down the books on top of a bin and walked toward him and placed her arms around his neck and leaned in closely.

"Where should we eat?"

=/\=

Kathryn and Chakotay returned to their home after having lunch almost two hours later. She couldn't help but smile at the thought of  _their home_. It had taken a long couple of weeks for them to find the perfect place they both loved.

When they returned from Lake George in April, they immediately began looking for a place to live. Chakotay was determined to find a house, even if it meant leaving the San Francisco area, while Kathryn was content in living in an apartment similar to the ones they already occupied in the Pacific Heights neighborhood.

The apartments they looked at were almost all the same as to the ones they already lived in. Chakotay countered that if they were going to move into a similar apartment, they might as well just move in together into one of the ones they already lived in. Kathryn didn't really want to admit it, but she knew he was right. That would at least save one of them the hassle of packing. The houses Chakotay suggested were adequate, but Kathryn always seemed to have some sort of issue with them: they were quite far from the Academy and Headquarters, they were too big or too small in size, or they just didn't  _feel_  right.

She knew Chakotay was a patient man but even he was starting to lose his patience. They both were. She had started to think moving in together was a bad idea. They hardly ever argued, but in the recent weeks they had managed to find something to squabble about almost every day. There were times they didn't even spend the night together.

One day they received a message from B'Elanna. Chakotay had confided in her that Kathryn and he were having problems finding a place to live and their relationship, in turn, was beginning to suffer. B'Elanna laughed at the idea. Their relationship was almost too perfect, she pointed out. Minor disagreements weren't going to make it end. In the message, B'Elanna told them she had heard of a house that had just become available in the Sea Cliff community bordering the Presidio. She didn't know the details, but she knew it probably wouldn't be available for long. Chakotay and Kathryn figured they had nothing to lose by visiting the place.

When they arrived at the house's location, they were met with a gorgeous two story home. The outside of the house still held its Victorian façade, but the inside was completely modernized. There were enough rooms to have guest bedrooms and an office for Chakotay. There was a fairly large backyard. The bathrooms came equipped with sonic showers, as well as bathtubs, which Kathryn quickly fell in love with. Best of all was the gorgeous view of the Bay and the Golden Gate Bridge from the bedroom window. Kathryn and Chakotay could not have been more impressed with a location. It was perfect and everything they both wanted.

Within a week they were told they were the proud new owners of the home of their dreams. Now it was all a matter of packing and moving in.

And here they were, in their new home surrounded by bins of their personal belongings. Kathryn really did want to unpack, but the exhaustion from her trip and the rush to get everything together had worn her out. She wasn't going to fight it this time, she was just going to relax and worry about everything else tomorrow.

Kathryn joined Chakotay, who had already made his way out to the patio. He had opened a bottle of champagne Tom and B'Elanna had sent over earlier congratulating them on their new home.

"I thought we could enjoy this," he said, as he handed her a glass.

"How about a toast?"

"Sounds perfect. Would you do the honors?"

Kathryn paused. There was so much she was grateful for, so much she wanted to say.

"To the new chapter in our life," she said, raising her glass, touching it against Chakotay's.

They kissed each other lightly on the lips and each took a seat on one of the patio chairs. They sat close to one another, holding hands over the arms rests, while they continued to sip their champagne.

They had sat in silence until Chakotay asked, "I know this might not be on your list of priorities but is there anything special you want to do for your birthday? It's only a week away."

Leave it to Chakotay to remember everything, she thought. She hadn't even bothered thinking about her birthday. To be honest, she had almost forgotten it was so soon. In the past years she had worked right through it so many occasions.

"I really haven't put any thought into it really, but I would like to spend my day with you."

"We can definitely spend the day together," Chakotay said, smiling mischievously and winking at her.

Kathryn couldn't help but laugh. She always enjoyed his playful moods.

They spent the rest of the afternoon talking and enjoying the view of their new yard. When the sun started to set Kathryn said, "I know this might sound rather odd, but I am ready to go to bed. I haven't slept well in the last few nights and I'm very tired. The champagne didn't help matters either."

"Well I guess its early bedtime for both of us," Chakotay said, laughing.

Chakotay picked up the empty champagne bottle and the empty glasses and followed Kathryn into the house. He set the items on the kitchen counter and met her at the bottom of the stairs. They interlocked arms and slowly made their way up the steps to spend the first night together in their new home.

=/\=

A week had passed since they had moved in and by now everything had been unpacked and placed in their respective location. It had taken less time to unpack than both had expected.

It was early Saturday morning. Chakotay walked up the stairs very carefully carrying a tray. He made every effort to try not to spill anything as he made his way to their bedroom. When he entered the room, he noticed Kathryn was still asleep. He wasn't sure if he should wake her, but if he didn't, the breakfast he had just prepared for her was going to get cold.

He set the tray on the night stand and gently sat on the edge of the bed by Kathryn. She hardly moved. He reached up and brushed his fingers through her silky hair. She smiled but didn't open her eyes.

"Good morning," Chakotay whispered, as he leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her cheek, still caressing her hair.

"More sleep," Kathryn mumbled, snuggling up on her side under the covers even more.

Chakotay continued placing kisses on her cheek and eventually whispered in her ear, "Happy Birthday, my love."

Kathryn slowly opened her eyes and turned on her back, smiling. "Thank you," she said, placing her hand on the back of his head and drawing him closer to her and kissing him on the mouth.

"I hope you're hungry because I made you breakfast," he stated, once their lips parted.

"Wow, breakfast in bed? I think I should have a birthday more often."

By now, Kathryn was sitting upright, with her back against some pillows and headboard. Chakotay moved the tray from the nightstand onto her lap. He stood up and made his way to the other side of the bed. He got in next to her and lay down on his side, resting his head on his hand.

"I made you some pancakes, scrambled eggs, and your favorite caffeinated, hot beverage," he told her, chuckling.

Kathryn sighed as she looked at the plate on her tray. Everything was perfect and looked delicious. She couldn't help but smile.

"You spoil me," she said, looking at Chakotay.

"Yes, but that's because I love you."

"You're not going to eat?"

"Maybe later. I'm not hungry at the moment," he replied, as he turned onto his back, placing a hand on his bare chest. "When you're done, I have a surprise for you."

"Oh?" She stopped eating and gave him an impish smile, raising one eyebrow.

"No. Not that. It's downstairs."

"Can we go downstairs now?"

"No."

"Can I get a hint?"

"No."

"Can I guess?"

"No. Kathryn, you really are like a little kid at times," he said, laughing.

"I can't help it. I'm just curious. You can't tell me you have a surprise and expect me to casually accept it and eat my breakfast."

"I should know better by now."

"Yes, you should," she replied, giggling. "Fine, I'll eat. Then you'll show me?"

"Hmmm…I don't know now. Maybe I'll just wait until later in the day. Or tomorrow."

In an irritated move, Kathryn threw her napkin at Chakotay. It landed on his face which caused him to burst into laughter. He really did enjoy teasing Kathryn at times.

=/\=

"Ok, now close your eyes," Chakotay told Kathryn.

Kathryn gave him a 'Why do I have to close my eyes for?' look but decided to go along with it. She had finished her breakfast rather quickly and both had made their way down the stairs. He had stopped once they had reached the base of the steps.

When she closed her eyes, Chakotay took her hand. "Ok, Kathryn, I'm going to lead you slowly to the living room."

They both walked gingerly toward the living room. As much as Kathryn liked surprises, she didn't like not knowing where she was stepping. At least the living room wasn't that far from the stairs. She felt Chakotay place his hands on her shoulders.

"Ok. You can stop. And when you're ready you can open your eyes."

Kathryn slightly opened one eye to take a peek, and then gradually opened the other. She wasn't really sure she was seeing what she was actually seeing. At the far end of the living room stood a grand piano.

Kathryn was utterly shocked. She stared at the piano for a while longer, then turned to look at Chakotay, who had been observing her the whole time.

"What is this?"

"It's a piano" he said, grinning.

"Well I know that. But what is this doing here?"

"It's your birthday present." Chakotay walked closer to her and took her hand. "You said you always wanted to learn to play an instrument. Well here is your chance."

Kathryn was speechless. She stood in shock staring at Chakotay as a flood of emotions took over her. She never expected anything like this. He had really outdone himself this time.

"I don't know what to say." She paused for a while longer, staring at the piano then back at Chakotay. "Thank you so much….this really means a lot to me. Oh Chakotay, you are always so thoughtful" she said, leaning into him, kissing him passionately on the lips.

"I'm glad you like it"

"No. I don't like it. I love it," Kathryn corrected.

They both held hands as they walked toward the piano. Then it dawned on Kathryn, when had he gotten the piano inside? They had gone to bed way after midnight, so it must have been somewhere in between then and breakfast.

"Chakotay, how did you get this here?"

"I carried it. I'm quite strong"

"You really are a smart one this morning, aren't you?" She said, pursing her lips while placing her hands on her hips.

Chakotay laughed. "I had it beamed in this morning. I bought it a couple of days ago and had it stored at Tom and B'Elanna's until I could transport it here."

Kathryn moved closer to the piano and ran her hands over the slick keys. "Well, now I need to learn how to play"

"Oh. I have another surprise."

"Another one?"

Chakotay walked to the piano and took a seat on the bench. He motioned for Kathryn to join him. She walked over and sat next to him.

"This isn't perfect but…" He took a deep breath, placed his fingers on the keys and started playing a tune.

At first Kathryn couldn't pinpoint where she recognize the familiar melody. Then she remembered.

"This is the song we first danced to," Kathryn whispered, slowly turning to look at Chakotay.

Chakotay looked up at her as he stopped playing. "I only know a small piece. I wanted to learn the whole song but didn't have the time. Maybe we can learn it together."

"I would love that. Can you play it again?" she asked, standing from the bench and walking behind him.

As Chakotay replayed the song, Kathryn stood behind him thinking how amazing he was to her. She had never had anyone in her life that met all her emotional and physical needs. As she let her mind wander, she couldn't help but gaze at Chakotay's bare back. She could see the movement of his muscles as he continued to play. Hi smooth, tanned skin glowing with the sunlight that came in through the windows. She found him irresistible.

She leaned down and hugged him from behind, wrapping her arms around his neck. Her hands moved across his chest, caressing his every muscle gently. She nuzzled her face into this neck. His scent was intoxicating. She gently started placing small kisses from his earlobe, down his neck to his collarbone.

Chakotay had managed to continue playing while she hugged him and stroked his chest. However, he lost concentration once she began to kiss him. Her warm lips against his cool skin sent shivers down his back and gave him goose bumps. He found her so seductive.

He got hold of her arms, which made Kathryn stop kissing him, and spun around on the bench to face her. They stared at each other, both with intense yearning in their eyes.

Kathryn took a step back, not taking her eyes off of him. The sexual tension between them was forceful. They were both breathing heavily even though they weren't even touching each other.

Kathryn slowly moved her hands under her silk nightgown and slid her underwear down her legs. She stepped out of them as they fell to the floor. Chakotay watched her every move intently, she noticed. She moved closer to him, placing her left hand on his shoulder and leaning him back toward the piano. With her right hand, she gently lifted her nightgown, and straddled his lap. His hands going directly toward her hips and grasping them. She could feel Chakotay's arousal against her body.

They gazed at each other, their chests touching against one another with every breath. Kathryn placed both her hands on his neck and licked her lips as she moved in closer to him. She could feel his warm breath against her moist lips.

"I love you," she whispered, as she placed a deep kiss on his welcoming mouth.

Their kisses, somewhat gentle at first, became erratic with every move. More force, more desire, more passion, behind every kiss. Their tongues met one another continuously. They nibbled on one another's lips whenever they parted.

Kathryn ran her hands through Chakotay's thick hair, pressing him closer to her, continuing to kiss him.

Chakotay gently ran his hand up her smooth thigh and slightly lifted her nightgown. He slid his hand underneath, running his fingers across her taut stomach then reaching for her full breasts. He slowly caressed his thumb over her nipple, which caused Kathryn to moan quietly and gently jerk at the sensations from his touch.

They momentarily stopped kissing, glancing at one another, while Chakotay continued to touch Kathryn's breasts. She continued to hold on to his neck while slowly moving her pelvis against his clothed erection. His touch was gentle, yet forceful, which made the experience more pleasurable.

Chakotay began an exploration of Kathryn's body. He moved his hands from her breasts to her back and down her back until he had a firm grip of her smooth behind. Her nightgown, however, was getting in the way of his adventure. He firmly got the hem of the gown and scrunched it up in his hands, sending a subtle message to Kathryn that he wanted it off. Receiving his hint, Kathryn lifted her arms as Chakotay slid the nightgown over her body and tossed it to the floor. Chakotay liked this view much better. He moved his hands back on to her bottom and pressed her closer to him, her hard nipples making contact with his chest.

They ardently continued kissing one another as Chakotay moved his hands from her backside to her thighs. He longed to pleasure her; to listen to hear moan in satisfaction. He carefully trickled his fingers down and up her inner thigh, increasing and decreasing the pressure of his fingers as he moved them. He casually glanced up at Kathryn whenever he moved his fingers. She had her eyes closed and lips slightly parted waiting for the impending satisfaction. Her breathing was increasing drastically. He finally stopped his quest, moved his fingers into her wetness and slowly rubbed her sensitive spot. His touch sent a wave of electricity throughout Kathryn's body. He always knew exactly what to do to get the right response from her.

As he continued, Kathryn felt her body react to his every touch. She moved against him, seeking even more pleasure. Her lips were parted, her moans grew louder, and her breathing became more uneven and short. Her eyes had remained shut since Chakotay began his exploits. The sensations running through her body were unbelievable and she was going to reach the peak of her pleasure at any moment. With a couple more strokes, Kathryn's body convulse against his as a loud cry escaped her mouth as she climaxed. Chakotay held her close to him while her breathing slowly returned to normal. Her body draped against his, with her head resting against his shoulder.

When Kathryn regained control of her body, she lifted her head, smiled, and kissed him on the lips. Knowing this was not over yet; she slightly scooted back on his lap and reached for his pajama bottoms. She lowered the waistband enough to let his full erection out. She didn't break eye contact with Chakotay as she got hold of him. She lifted her body slightly and slowly lowered herself onto him. The sensations were unbelievable. They both moved their bodies against one another. Chakotay placed his hands on Kathryn's waist as he lowered his head toward her breasts. He licked her nipples before nibbling on them gently. Kathryn moaned as her arousal increased again. They continued to move against one another, increasing their speed with every thrust. Their breathing was short, their moans and groans echoing throughout the house. Their thrusts continued until Chakotay climaxed, succumbing to pleasure. He pressed his face against Kathryn's chest, breathing heavily against her damp, warm skin. She delicately placed one hand on his head and placed the other on his back, holding him tightly to her. They were still intimately joined.

"Well, this is definitely one birthday I will never forget," she managed to whisper in between breaths.

Chakotay raised his head slowly to face her and placed a kiss lightly on her lips. "If I knew you would have this reaction to a piano I would have given you one a long time ago," he replied, chuckling lightly.

Kathryn was about to stand up but Chakotay stopped her. "Hold on to my neck," he said, as he got steady hold of her, lifted them both up as Kathryn wrapped her legs around his body. He moved them to the comfort of the couch. "I don't want to stop just yet, but my body cannot take another second on that bench."

Kathryn giggled and asked inquisitively, "so what do you have planned now?"

"This," he said, as he got hold of Kathryn hips and slid her body down on the couch. He gently placed himself on top of her, settling in between her legs. "I love you so much," he told her, while moving the hair away from her face. He placed several kisses along her jawline until her reached her mouth.

"I love you too," she replied, as she wrapped her legs around him.

They made love on the couch again. They never left the living room until later in the afternoon when they eventually made their way to the bedroom. The special dinner plans Chakotay had made were forgotten. Kathryn was sure this was the best birthday she had ever had.


	10. Chapter 10

**July 2379**

"How long will you be gone?"

"A couple of days," replied Chakotay, taking a sip from his coffee cup, while reading over a message on a PADD.

"Oh that's not too bad."

Kathryn and Chakotay sat at their dining room table eating breakfast before she had to go to work. Chakotay had just received a message from Starfleet Academy informing him Cambridge University was interested in having him speak about his recently published research paper. His initial excitement had slowly been replaced by a somber mood.

Kathryn noticed Chakotay's change in attitude. He hadn't even looked up from the PADD. After a long moment of silence, she realized he wasn't giving up any more information willingly. She was going to have to force all the details out of him.

"When will this talk happen?" Kathryn asked.

"Depends."

"Depends on what?"

"My schedule."

"Well, you are fairly free since the Academy is currently not in session."

"Right."

"Chakotay, is there something wrong? Normally, I don't have to pry information out of you. It's usually the other way around."

Chakotay sighed heavily and finally looked up from his PADD toward Kathryn. "I'm sorry. I'm just trying to process all this information. I'm honestly just overwhelmed at the moment."

Kathryn reached her hand out and grasped his. She gave him a soft smile and said, "You will do great. I read your work and it is amazing. Besides, you speak in front of a large group of people several times a week. It's not much different than that."

"Kathryn, this is completely different. Well, not completely, but almost. Whenever I lecture, I speak to a group of cadets. They are young and are still learning. Also, I'm usually familiar with them. However, this, this thing I've been invited to is going to be composed of many respected researchers and scientist," Chakotay said, while tapping his finger on the PADD.

"Oh, Chakotay. You'll do fine. You are just stressing yourself out over something small. Everything is going to go smoothly and you have plenty of time to prepare."

"I know. I truly am honored but I just feel this…pressure. I'm sure it will pass once I get all my thoughts straight."

"Trust me. You'll be great," Kathryn said, standing up from the table, placing a kiss on his lips, and walking to the kitchen with her empty coffee cup. "Plus, you can just use your charm to win everyone over."

"I don't do that."

"Oh no. Of course you don't," Kathryn replied in a mockingly serious tone.

Chakotay couldn't help but chuckle. After a moment he asked, "Do you think you could join me?"

"I'm not sure. It's somewhat busy at work right now. I'll let you know for sure once you settle on a date," she yelled from the kitchen.

"Well, I hope you can."

"I do too. I would love to see  _Professor_  Chakotay in action," she said, peeking her head out of the doorway, a mischievous smile on her face.

Chakotay laughed. She always knew exactly what to say, and do, to make him feel better.

=/\=

It was a rather warm day for the end of July, Chakotay noted, as he made his way through the Cambridge campus. However, he was sure his discomfort with the temperature was due to his elevated stress. He was scheduled to give his speech in about fifteen minutes which gave him enough time to make it to the special events lecture hall and have a couple minutes to settle down.

When he finally arrived at the hall, he was greeted by the Chancellor and several professors from the Anthropology Department. He still had time before he had to begin so he decided to take a seat and observe his surroundings.

The lecture hall was twice, if not three times, as large as the one he lectured at the Academy. That was somewhat intimidating. However, the audience was almost in darkness since several spotlights were focused on the podium obscuring his view. In a way, that made Chakotay relax. He could just pretend he was in his own lecture hall at the Academy.

He couldn't help but let his mind wander to Kathryn and how right she had been right when he initially received the invite. She told him everything was going to go smoothly and it was the same as lecturing at the Academy. He so desperately wanted her to be there, but she had been unable to attain leave from Headquarters. She had been very supportive of him while he wrote his paper and afterwards when it was published, that he felt she was part of the reason for his success.

Chakotay noticed the Chancellor stand up and make her way toward him.

"Are you ready, Professor Chakotay?" she asked, smiling.

Chakotay nodded and the Chancellor made her way to the podium. The voices that drifted toward the stage from the darkness slowly began to fade into silence when they noticed the figure approach the stand.

"Welcome everyone to Cambridge University. I hope you are having a wonderful time so far. I am truly delighted to have our presenter here today. As  _USS Voyager_ 'sformer First Officer, he has insight into species we never dreamed existed. In the seven years _Voyager_  was lost in an unexplored section of space, countless of first encounters were made. In his research paper,  _Species 8472: The Unknown Creatures of Fluidic Space_ , he recounts various meeting with this specific creature. At the end of the lecture, he will gladly answer all of your questions. Well, before I end up taking up any more of your time, please help me in welcoming Professor Chakotay from Starfleet Academy."

The loud applause overwhelmed Chakotay as he got up from his chair and walked toward the front of the stage. From the sound of the clapping, he was certain there were more people in attendance than he originally thought there would be. The crowd grew silent once he took his place at the podium.

"Thank You Chancellor T'Vin for that wonderful introduction and I also want to thank Cambridge University for inviting me to speak about my research paper today. Also, thank you everyone for showing interest in my paper I really do appreciate the support from everyone." Chakotay paused briefly. "The journey on  _Voyager_  was long, arduous, and never dull. They were seven very long years. However, those seven years drastically altered my life and I would not change that for anything. As many of you know, I was a Maquis outlaw when my crew and I first encountered  _Voyager_  in the Delta Quadrant. Due to Captain Kathryn Janeway's confidence, trust, and extraordinary leadership skills, my crew and I were able to integrate with hers and work as one. Together we managed to survive various encounters with several hostile species. Today I will be speaking about Species 8472, creatures that started off as enemies and ended up as uncharacteristic allies."

Chakotay spoke continuously for about forty minutes on the topic. He detailed their first encounter with Species 8472 and their threat to the Borg. He went on to explain how they attempted an alliance with the Borg in order to protect themselves. Lastly, he talked about the most interesting aspect, the fact Species 8472 created a simulation of Starfleet Headquarters as a training ground in case of an invasion from Starfleet. He finished on the note on how they had managed to work together to come into agreement.

When he finished he asked, "Does anyone have any questions?"

A voice from the audience came through the darkness.

"Yes. This person, Valerie Archer, what exactly happened between the two of you in her residence? I feel the details are vague in the article."

A giant grin spread across Chakotay's face as when recognized the voice. Even in the darkness, he knew it was Kathryn. She had such a distinctive voice and he loved everything about it. How she had gotten there, he didn't know, and he honestly didn't care. He was just glad she had managed to make it to his presentation.

"If you don't mind, I can discuss those details with you after the lecture on a one-on-one basis," replied Chakotay, in the most composed tone he could pull together.

"That sounds acceptable,  _Professor_."

Chakotay had to close his eyes briefly and slightly lower his head as he desperately tried to suppress a laugh.

Once he had regained his composure, he asked, "Anymore questions?"

He spent the next twenty minutes or so clarifying some points and speculating whether Species 8472 posed a threat in the Alpha Quadrant. Chakotay was certain Species 8472 were not a threat to this sector, but the creatures may show an interest in the area in a non-aggressive way.

When no one had any more questions, Chakotay said, "Thank you all for joining me today. I hope you had a wonderful afternoon and found this lecture informative. I appreciative everyone taking time from their busy schedules to attend."

He was greeted with a loud round of applause as the lights in the audience slowly brightened. Chakotay noticed the hall was almost filled to capacity, which made him feel a great sense of pride, but those feelings didn't last long because he was a tad too preoccupied by one thing: finding Kathryn in the audience.

His quest was soon interrupted by several people that wanted to congratulate him or ask him a couple questions not related to Species 8472. By the time he was left alone, the hall was empty. Kathryn was nowhere to be seen.  _Maybe it wasn't Kathryn? Could I have possibly imagined it?_  As he was about to walk out of the hall, the Chancellor's aide walked in with a PADD.

"Professor Chakotay, I have a message for you," he said, handing him the tablet.

Chakotay thanked him and once the aide left, he read the message:

> _Meet me at the Petrillo's Italian Restaurant, right off the campus._
> 
> _–K_

Chakotay grinned. At least I know I'm not crazy, he thought, and began his walk toward the restaurant.

=/\=

Chakotay entered the restaurant about thirty minutes after leaving the lecture hall. The place was somewhat empty and it wasn't what Chakotay expected at all. He was used to the Italian eateries in San Francisco that had a very themed look. This place was quite the opposite: very modern and stylish.

He looked around quickly at the tables and didn't spot Kathryn. He was about to ask the host if he had seen her, when he noticed her sitting at the bar drinking a glass of white wine. She looked radiant. She wore a black knee-length, short sleeved dress that hugged every curvature of her body perfectly. He had never seen her wear that dress before. He took a moment to take in her appearance, before making his way toward the bar.

"Well, hello there," Chakotay whispered, as he leaned against the bar, placing an elbow on the countertop and clasping his hands together.

Kathryn looked unfazed. She slowly moved her head toward his direction. "Excuse me? Do I know you?" she asked, raising one eyebrow, looking somewhat confused.

Chakotay figured he would play along and answered, "No, but I couldn't help but notice a beautiful woman sitting alone and I thought I would introduce myself."

"Oh I see. Well, I'm Kathryn Janeway," she said, smiling and reaching her hand out to shake his. "And you are?"

"I'm Chakotay. It's a pleasure to meet you," he replied, taking her small hand into his and shaking it gently.

"Chakotay. That's an interesting name. It's very…distinct. And so is that tattoo of yours."

"I've been told that before. This tattoo represents the memory of my father. It's a somewhat lengthy story. Do you mind if I take a seat?"

"No, go right ahead."

Chakotay took a seat right next to Kathryn. He moved a bit closer to her which caused her to casually glance at him, but she didn't move away. He ordered himself a glass of white wine to accompany her.

"So Kathryn, do you come here often?"

"Actually I don't. This is my first time here."

"Oh"

"I'm actually waiting for someone. But I feel I have to warn you, he's somewhat of the jealous type."

Chakotay couldn't help but chuckle. "Oh really?"

"Yes. It's a terrible trait, honestly, but I find it so endearing," she said, with a smirk.

"Well this person is a very lucky to have such a beautiful woman as his companion."

Kathryn blushed. "Well, he is very handsome himself. He's also very charming, smart, and very considerate. He knows exactly how I liked to be touched."

Chakotay choked on the wine he was drinking and exclaimed, "Kathryn!"

Kathryn burst into laughter at Chakotay's dumbfounded expression. "I was wondering how long we could keep this up," she said, while still laughing.

"I hope you don't go around telling people that," Chakotay said, wiping some wine from his lips with a napkin.

"Oh of course I do. I scream it from the rooftops daily."

"How much wine have you had?" Chakotay asked, jokingly.

They both laughed together, as Kathryn placed a hand on Chakotay's thigh and squeezed it softly. They leaned in closer and share a tender kiss.

"Your presentation was perfect, Chakotay. You did an amazing job," Kathryn said, when they pulled apart.

"I wish I knew you were going to be there. You really caught me by surprise."

"That was my plan all along."

Chakotay laughed. "Well it worked."

Kathryn leaned in closer and placed her hand on his cheek. "I really am proud of you, you know?"

Chakotay gently took hold of her hand and placed a soft kiss on her wrist, "I know. But I didn't do it all by myself. I have you to thank as well."

They both smiled at one another and sat in silence for a bit, gazing into each other's eyes. After a moment Chakotay said, "How about we get a table and have something to eat."

"I'm not going to argue with that."

=/\=

After they finished their meal, Kathryn and Chakotay decided to take a stroll through the city. It was still light out and they had plenty of time before the sun started to set.

They walked hand in hand taking in the sights of this historic town until they came to a quaint little park.

"How about we find a bench and relax a little," suggested Chakotay.

"Sounds like a good idea to me. All this walking, and that filling meal, has made me somewhat tired."

Chakotay laughed. "Me too. There's a nice bench over there, right under that tree," he said, while pointing in the direction of the location.

They both took a seat on the wooden bench and Chakotay wrapped his arm around Kathryn. The sun was beginning to set and there was a slight chill in the air. They huddled a little closer together to keep warm.

"It's so beautiful here. I've been to this city before but never truly enjoyed it like today. I guess I never took the time to take in the little things," Kathryn said, leaning her head back, resting it on Chakotay's arm, and closing her eyes.

"I know what you mean. Same thing happened to me in San Francisco. All those years while at the Academy, before I joined the Maquis, and I don't think I ever took the time to explore the city until we returned home."

"Maybe our time on  _Voyager_  taught us to enjoy what we have around us," said Kathryn, lifting her head from his arm and looking at him.

"I think so. But it also helps when you have amazing company to enjoy it with," Chakotay replied, leaning in closer to Kathryn to place a kiss on her supple lips. "I wish you didn't have to go home tonight."

"Who said I was going home?" she retorted.

"I just assumed. I mean you do have work tomorrow."

"I do, but I can transport over in the morning. I don't have anything on my schedule until noon. Unless you don't want me to stay?" Kathryn asked, pursing her lips and pretending to have her feelings hurt.

"Actually I don't. I want to gallivant throughout the city alone at night. See what trouble I can get myself into," he said, while side-eyeing Kathryn.

Kathryn playfully gasped and exclaimed, "How dare you!"

She jokingly tried to swat Chakotay's arm but he had faster reflexes. He managed to get hold of her hand and draw her closer to him. He kissed her passionately on the lips, then on her cheek, onto her jawline then down and up her neck. Kathryn could only let out a quiet moan.

"Of course I want you to stay," he whispered in her ear.

"Maybe we should make our way back to your room."

"I like your way of thinking," he replied, as he placed one quick kiss on her lips.

They both stood up and made their way out of the park. Chakotay had a feeling he wasn't going to get a lot of sleep tonight.


	11. Chapter 11

**October 2379**

It had been a couple of somewhat eventful months for Kathryn and Chakotay. Since their return from Chakotay's presentation at Cambridge, they managed to get away almost every opportunity they had. Every weekend they had free, they would escape to a different city and take in the sights.

During the week, when Chakotay was still on break from the Academy, he found projects to keep himself entertained around the house. He built a swing set for their back yard which Kathryn immediately fell in love with because it gave her a comfortable place to read outside. He had also taken the time to learn how to make various meals from scratch, which he surprised her with when she got home from work.

And there was the one week where Kathryn's nephew stayed with them while Phoebe and Michael took a romantic getaway, their first since the kids had been born. Chakotay was delighted to watch the boys while their parents were away. However, by the end of the week, he was physically and mentally exhausted. He really loved the boys but couldn't wait for them to return home with their parents. Chakotay had also found it odd that during the entire week Kathryn had managed to get tangled up in late meetings or events she could not excuse herself out of. It was all very convenient.

In September, Chakotay returned to teaching at the Academy. Due to the popularity of his previous class, an additional course was added to his schedule, which meant he had twice the workload. He honestly didn't mind the additional work but the long hours occasionally interfered with his time with Kathryn, and that did bother him. As time went on lot of their weekend outings were cut short, or didn't happen at all, and most of their meals were products of the replicator.

Even though she missed spending all their extra time together, Kathryn didn't mind having some extra time to herself, mainly since she had become obsessed with learning all her favorite compositions on the piano. There were some pieces she could play perfectly and others she still struggled with. She spent hours during her free time trying to perfect the pieces she could just not get right. She was enjoying playing the piano so much she was even considering trying to learn another instrument. She considered the violin, the Vulcan lute, and even the clarinet, which always reminded her of Harry.

By the time October rolled around, things were getting tense within Starfleet. Two planets were considering renouncing their alliance with the Federation and this was causing serious problems at Headquarters. Kathryn began to work long hours and occasional weekends. Chakotay's schedule hadn't changed much either. They briefly saw each other in the morning before work and there were times when Chakotay would go to bed and Kathryn was still not home. Their relationship was still a product of perfection, but they both missed having time to themselves and enjoy one another.

They decided this problem needed to be fixed.

It was Friday night and Chakotay was desperately rushing home. He was over an hour late to meet with Kathryn. They had agreed to make every effort to be home by 18:00, that way they could enjoy dinner together and spend the rest of the night relaxing. However, his office hours had run over and unexpected visitors had delayed him. He had tried to contact Kathryn various times to let her know he was going to be late, but she was nowhere to be found. He was feeling pangs of guilt in his stomach.

Once he arrived at their home and walked up the front steps, he noticed there were no lights on in the house.  _Maybe she's not home yet?_  When he opened the front door he was met with darkness. The soft shadows cast from the moon were the only visible lights in the room.

He took a couple steps into the dark room before he said, "Computer, first floor lights."

The lights went on immediately. Chakotay glanced around the room. Everything seemed in place and normal, until he noticed an empty wine glass on the dining room table. That had not been there when he left for work after Kathryn. He picked up the glass and noticed smudges of lipstick on the rim. He couldn't help but smile. That crimson lipstick always made Kathryn's lips so enticing.

He set the wine glass back on the table and called out, "Kathryn!?"

No response.

He removed his jacket and left it on the back of one of the dining room chairs. He cautiously walked up the stairs listening for any sounds. He once again called out, "Kathryn?"

Still no response.

He made his way down the hallway into their bedroom. It was also dark. When he called for lights, he noticed Kathryn's Admiral Uniform strewn on the bed.

_Maybe she came home and left?_

He was about to call out for her one more time when he noticed a dim light under the closed bathroom door. He slowly walked to the door and gently knocked.

"Kathryn?" he said softly, pressing his ear against the surface

When he didn't hear a response, he carefully opened the door and peeked inside. The lighting was set to half the normal brightness and several candles lit up the rest of the bathroom. Inside the bathtub lay a sleeping Kathryn. Her head rested against a towel, her hair wrapped into a messy bun. On the floor lay a PADD that had most likely fallen out of her outstretched hand. Most of the bath bubbles had disappeared and Chakotay could see her naked body through the water.

Chakotay picked up the PADD from the floor and placed it on a nearby shelf as he gingerly made his way to the bathtub. He knelt down, stretched out his hand, and carefully caressed Kathryn's cheek. He wondered how long she had been asleep in there.

Her eyes fluttered at his touch. She opened her eyes and looked over at him.

"You're late," she mumbled, as she blinked her eyes a couple of times.

"You look radiant."

"Don't try to charm yourself out of this. You're still late."

Chakotay couldn't help but smile. "I'm sorry. I was held up. I tried to contact you a couple of times but wasn't successful."

"I was able to leave work earlier than expected. That's probably why you couldn't reach me. I got home, had a glass of wine and figured I had enough time to take a relaxing bath before you got home."

"Well you look very relaxed to me," he said, leaning in and kissing her on the lips, accidentally wetting his shirt sleeve in the process. He groaned loudly. "Give me a second so I can change my shirt and I'll be back."

"I have a better idea, why don't you take your shirt and the rest of your clothing off and join me," Kathryn replied, with a smirk.

For a moment Chakotay was going to argue with her about how they needed to eat dinner and then realized how foolish he sounded. He stood up from beside the bathtub, slowly removed his shoes, shirt, pants, and underwear, while never losing eye contact with Kathryn, who watched his every move intently.

She slightly leaned forward in the tub as he stepped in and slid in behind her. The water was warm but not as warm as Kathryn's damp back when she rested it against his chest, he noticed. His legs surrounded her body and he could feel the smoothness of her legs when they touched his. He moved his hands from the edge of the tub and slowly slid them down her partially submerged chest until he reached her stomach and rested them there. They hadn't enjoyed each other in this manner in a long time.

He lowered his head and nuzzled her neck. Her subtle scent was invigorating. He couldn't help himself and he gently ran the tip of his tongue up her neck, until he reached her earlobe and nibbled on it. Kathryn loved the sensation from his tongue on her skin and his warm breath caressing her ear; they sent shivers down her body. She stretched one arm above her head and wrapped it around Chakotay's neck, pressing him closer to her. She slowly turned her head toward him. When he felt Kathryn's head move, he stopped, lifted his own and was met with her welcoming lips. They kissed passionately as the water rippled against their bodies. Chakotay moved his hand from her stomach and placed it on one of her breasts. He gave it a gentle squeeze and continued to caress it as they kissed.

When both stopped kissing, they relaxed against one another. Chakotay placed his hands back on her stomach, as Kathryn moved hers to his thighs. She touched them lightly with her fingertips, noticing every muscle.

"I picked up a PADD from the floor. What were you reading?" he asked, softly.

"Oh, some work related stuff. I think that's why I fell asleep so quickly," she replied, chuckling.

"I thought we agreed we would leave work behind this weekend?"

"I know. And I promise I will. No more talk about work until Monday."

After a moment of silence, Chakotay said, "Kathryn…I've missed you."

"What do you mean? You see me every day," she said, rather confused.

"I've missed this. This intimacy. I miss spending time with you like this. We've been so busy we haven't really enjoyed each other in some time. Everything has been quick and without…passion."

Kathryn sighed. "I know what you mean. We really need to make an effort and not let work become our lives. We can't let it run us."

"It's easier said than done."

"That's true." She paused. "Well, let's start now."

She carefully stood up and stepped out of the tub. Water droplets cascaded down her body and onto the floor. She reached her hand out and Chakotay instinctively took hold of it. He stood up and got out of the tub as well. There was a puddle forming where they stood, naked, gazing at each other in silence.

Kathryn once again grabbed Chakotay's hand and led him to their bedroom. They both stopped at the edge of the bed.

"I think the sheets can dry us off," she said, arching her eyebrow and smiling at him.

"Oh, I love your way of thinking," Chakotay replied, kissing her on the lips and slowly lowering her body onto the bed.

=/\=

Kathryn awoke to the sound of rain hitting the windows. She could see some light but she couldn't quite tell if it was early or late in the morning because it was rather gloomy outside. She was about to ask the computer for the time when she noticed Chakotay was still asleep and didn't want to wake him. She figured she didn't need to know the time anyway. It's not like she had any plans for the day. Her only goal was to relax and spend time with Chakotay.

She moved onto her side to face him. He's gorgeous, she thought, as she took the time to observe him as he slept. She let her eyes roam from his tattoo onto his luscious, full lips, down his bronzed, muscular chest, and then to the sheet that was barely covering him from the waist down.

_How we resisted each other for seven years I will never know._

She was tempted to wake him, but knew she shouldn't. He was probably exhausted from their late night activities. She was surprised she was wide awake herself. They had gone to sleep several hours after they had gotten out of the bathtub. They both decided to eat a light snack when they realized neither of them had eaten dinner. By the time they headed back to bed, it was close to 03:00.

Kathryn moved onto her back again. She couldn't help but think how wonderful their night had been. They hadn't spent a night like that in some time. The spark between them was always there, the problem was the time and energy. She was just glad they had made an effort to plan a weekend to themselves.

As she lay there, snuggled under the sheets, she couldn't help but let her mind wander to the previous hours. As she closed her eyes, she was sure she could still feel the weight of Chakotay on top of her body. She felt his hands making their way across her breasts and his warm tongue caressing her nipples. She felt his hand grasp her thigh as he moved his way into her, deeper with every thrust. She felt his ragged breathing against her neck after they had both climaxed, their bodies covered in a thin layer of perspiration.

She was so lost in her pleasant thoughts that she jumped when she felt a hand touch her arm. She immediately opened her eyes and noticed Chakotay staring at her with a smirk on his face. She couldn't help but feel slightly embarrassed.

"Good morning," he said, "you must have been having some interesting thoughts."

"I was," she replied, sheepishly. She stared at the ceiling trying not to look at him.

"Care to share the details?"

"Not particularly."

"For a moment there I thought you were still asleep until I saw some of your facial expressions. I'm pretty sure some of them I recognize from last night."

"Chakotay!"

He couldn't help but laugh. "Come here," he said, as he reached his arms out and pulled her close to him, kissing her on the lips.

They snuggled against one another for a while. Chakotay's hands moving up and down Kathryn's smooth back, gently kissing her every so often on the cheek. They listened to the rain as it hit the roof and windows with strength. It had such a calming effect.

"So are you going to tell me what you were thinking about," whispered Chakotay.

Kathryn couldn't help but smile again. "I was thinking about last night."

"Ohhhh," he replied, raising one eyebrow.

"I had a wonderful time."

"Me too," he said, kissing her again on the lips.

"I'm just glad we were able to spend our time together without interruptions or late meetings or early lectures or whatever getting in the way."

"Well we do have all of today and tomorrow to make up for lost time," he replied, winking at her.

Kathryn laughed loudly. He could feel her body shake against his.

"You know, we aren't teenagers anymore. I'm not sure how much my body can take."

"Are you calling me old!?" Chakotay said, pretending to be offended.

"I'm calling  _us_  old!"

"Speak for yourself! I still have the prowess of The Tattooed Terror!"

Kathryn burst into laughter again, burrowing her face into a pillow. When she finally lifted her head, Chakotay noticed tears running down her red face.

"I haven't heard you call yourself that in years!" She paused to catch her breath. "The Tattooed Terror!" She continued to laugh.

"Don't mock me, Admiral!"

He was pretending to be angry, but it wasn't working. Kathryn's laughter was just so infectious; he couldn't help but laugh along with her. He loved seeing her like this. He couldn't remember the last time he had heard her laugh with such enthusiasm.

"I'm sorry Chakotay," she said, wiping a couple tears from her cheek, "I just forgot about that nickname."

"Don't apologize, Kathryn. It was definitely worth seeing you laugh that hard…even if it is at my expense," he said, side eyeing her.

She giggled again. "Will this make you feel better?" She leaned into him and kissed him passionately on the lips.

"Hmm…not quite. I think you need to try harder," he said, once their lips parted.

"Ok. How about this?" She asked as she slowly maneuvered her body on top of his. Her thighs straddling his sides. She leaned down and kissed him. Her kiss had more force and desire than before.

Chakotay was caught off guard by the impact her lips had on his. He ran his hands down her body and stopped once they reached her backside. Before she knew it, he had rolled her onto her back and lay on top of her. They continued to kiss with ardor, as Kathryn ran her foot down the back of Chakotay's legs.

They were definitely not leaving the bed anytime soon.

=/\=

"What do you feel like eating?" Chakotay asked, as he walked around the kitchen, in just his pajama bottoms.

"Pasta sounds good. Or a sandwich. Or soup. I don't know. You pick," she replied from the couch, nestled in her bathrobe.

When they had finally managed to make their way out of the bed, they had decided to eat some breakfast, until they realized it was past noon. The figured lunch would be a tad more appropriate.

"How about a salad with some spinach gnocchi?"

"That sounds really delicious."

After a couple minutes, Chakotay placed a couple dishes on the coffee table in front of Kathryn. He took a seat on the couch right beside her.

"I like your idea of having lunch on the couch. It is a lot more comfortable. And intimate," he said, kissing her lightly on the cheek.

"Plus, we can see the rain from the windows. I just love to watch it rain," Kathryn said, taking several bites of her salad.

"Me too. So many years on  _Voyager_  without seeing it rain. Unless you went to the holodeck."

"Well we did experience that severe storm on New Earth."

There was a small pause before Chakotay spoke. "Yes we did." He put down his fork and looked at her. "I think that was the first time we actually got really close to one another without getting too close."

Now it was Kathryn's turn to put down her fork and look at him. "You know," she paused, "I've always wondered what would have happened if  _Voyager_  wouldn't have returned to save us."

"I've wondered that too, days and weeks after we were rescued. To be honest, I have a feeling we would be doing exactly what we are doing now, except it wouldn't have taken us all these years to get here."

"You really think so?"

"Well yes. We were the only two people there. No ranks. Just us."

"And the monkey. Don't forget about the monkey."

Chakotay couldn't help but laugh. "I'm sure he made himself right at home in our make-shift house."

"I'm sure of it."

They continued to eat in silence until Chakotay spoke.

"Kathryn, do you ever wonder how things would have been different if we had given into temptation on  _Voyager_. You know, if we actually had become a couple years ago."

Kathryn stopped eating. She frowned and appeared to be thinking deeply. "In all honesty, I think Tuvok would have become Captain because you and I would not have left our quarters."

"That would not have happened!"

Kathryn chuckled. "No. I would never have given up the Captaincy. But that's the problem; I always had to be the Captain. I felt I could not let my priorities down in order to pursue my own pleasures. I had a crew that depended on me and my leadership. My goal was to get them home. Which I did." She paused and furrowed her brows. "Also, I don't think I could have lived with myself if something would have happened to you. Even if it wasn't my fault, I would have felt guilty."

"But something could have happened to me anyway, even if we were together or not."

"There's a difference, though. There's a barrier between friends and lovers. Once you cross that line, there are all these other emotions involved. I can be strong but everyone has an eventual breaking point and I think you would have been it."

"Well, I guess we really don't have to worry about that now, do we?" Chakotay replied, with a small smile.

"We really don't. I'm just glad we got to where we are now. And Chakotay," she paused, "I always loved you. All those years on  _Voyager_ , I loved you. I just could never tell you how I felt."

"You didn't have to tell me. I knew," he paused, "actually, I think the whole crew knew."

"You really think so?"

"I'm positive. Ask B'Elanna, Tom, or Harry. I think there were bets too."

"How did I never find out about that?"

"Because you were the Captain."

Kathryn couldn't help but chuckle. "I wonder what other things happened under my nose."

"You wouldn't want to know."

The continued to eat and reminisce about some of the more enjoyable times on  _Voyager_ , like talent night or the luau. In between all the hostilities and attacks, they did manage to have entertaining moments. By this time they had finished their lunch and were snuggled against one another under a blanket.

"Well  _Admiral_ , are you ready for Round Two? The Tattooed Terror has regained his energy and would like to battle a worthy opponent."

Kathryn chuckled. "I'm sorry, but I think The Tattooed Terror and Round Two will have to wait."

They both laughed as Chakotay leaned in closer to her and kissed her on the lips. "I'm really glad we made time for this."

"So am I," she replied, gently squeezing his thigh under the blanket.

They both sat huddled together watching the rain through the window until they both drifted off to sleep.


	12. Chapter 12

**December 2379**

"When do your office hours begin again?" Kathryn asked, as she took a sip of her coffee, looking up from her PADD.

"In about an hour."

"Oh."

"Why?"

"I just wanted to know how much time I had before I had to leave."

"You have plenty of time. Plus, I can just lock my door and pretend I'm not here," Chakotay said, smiling sheepishly at her.

"You can't do that!"

"Watch me!"

Kathryn laughed. "You wouldn't. I know you and you would never do that to your students."

"I know. But it's fun to imagine."

Kathryn had joined Chakotay in his office at the Academy for lunch. She needed to work late that evening and wasn't going to be home for dinner. She figured she could join him to eat, since he couldn't join her, to at least spend some time together.

Their work schedules had become a bit more relaxed in the past few weeks. All the issues at Headquarters had been resolved. After much effort and many diplomatic missions, the planets that threatened to leave the Federation, agreed to remain part of the union. This resolution allowed Kathryn to return to her normal working hours.

Also, Chakotay has been assigned a teaching assistant. The Academy realized he was being overworked when he accidentally missed some staff meetings due to scheduling conflicts. Chakotay didn't really like the idea of having an assistant at first, but soon changed his mind when he noticed how much extra time he was going to have. His assistant had taken over most of the minor grading, setting up the lecture hall, and held office hours when Chakotay was not available.

Kathryn had brought over tomato bisque for the both of them. It was the perfect light meal for a chilly December day. Chakotay ate at his desk, while Kathryn sat on his couch looking over some PADDs, sipping on her post-meal coffee.

"You know, I've been thinking, what if we invited our former crewmembers over for the holidays?" asked Chakotay.

"Ok," Kathryn replied, still looking over a PADD.

"I think it would be fun. We really haven't seen many of them recently."

"Uh-huh."

"And since we moved in, about seven months ago, we really haven't had any visitors over other than your mom or your sister and her family. We usually visit people, they don't come to us."

"Right."

Chakotay observed Kathryn wasn't paying attention. Whenever she gave quick responses like that, she was definitely not listening. And she hadn't even lifted her head from the PADD she had been studying for several minutes.

"We could invite the Borg Queen over too."

"All right."

"Maybe I'll walk around naked."

"Sounds good."

Most of the time it didn't bother him when she was engulfed in work, but right now he was getting somewhat upset with her. She had come all the way to his office to spend time with him, but all she kept doing was looking over the tablets.

"Kathryn!"

Kathryn jumped at the loudness of her name and the tone in Chakotay's voice.

"What?!" she asked, rather confused by his reaction.

"I've been talking to you for the past couple of minutes!"

"Oh."

"Yes. If you have that much work to do you should just return to your office."

Kathryn noticed the irritation in his tone. He normally didn't get upset with her. She figured he must have been asking her some serious questions if he was getting that bothered.

"I'm sorry. I was just reading a report on the advancements in slipstream technology. They are going to run some test flights in the next couple of months. They believe this technology will be available on most ships within a year."

There was nothing but silence from Chakotay's end, as he moved a couple things around his desk.

Kathryn was feeling guilty. She put down her cup and PADD and walked over to his desk and stood beside him. He acted as if he didn't see her. She gently placed a hand on his shoulder and leaned down a bit.

"I'm really sorry Chakotay. What was it that you were telling me?"

"It's not important."

She leaned in closer to him and softly said, "Of course it is. You wouldn't have brought it up if you didn't think it was."

There was no response from Chakotay.

Kathryn knew she didn't have a lot of time left before she had to leave. She leaned in further and placed a tender kiss on his lips.

"Kathryn, that's not going to work," he replied, once her lips left his.

She didn't say a word. Instead she moved her hand to his cheek and kissed him once again with a bit more force. This time she felt his lips slightly part, but immediately tense up in hesitation.

"You can't just kiss me and think I'm going to act like nothing happened."

She didn't respond. She merely put her hand on his shoulder again and swung his chair around so that he faced her. She gently sat on his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him toward her; their lips almost making contact with one another, while their warm breath could be felt on the other's face.

"I don't know what you are doing but…"

His words were interrupted when Kathryn pulled him toward her and kissed him with force. He tried to resist the temptation, but the sensation of her lips on his made it difficult. He fought the urge to reciprocate, however, soon lost the battle when her tongue licked his bottom lip. His lips unwittingly parted and their tongues met. Their kisses became more forceful with each passing second. He wrapped his arms around her body and ran his hands over her arms, back, and then through her hair. They kissed a bit longer until they parted.

Never giving up, Kathryn asked, "So are you going to tell me what you said?"

Chakotay laughed. "You really do know how to get what you want out of me."

"It's not my fault I know your weaknesses so well. At least those methods only work with me," she smiled.

"How do you know?"

Kathryn pursed her lips and arched an eyebrow. "Oh I know."

They were about to lean into one another for one more kiss when the chime to Chakotay's office went off.

"Office hours!" whispered Chakotay, with a wide-eyed look. He was so enthralled in the moment he had lost track of the time.

Kathryn immediately pushed herself off of him and fixed her uniform top. She quickly, but quietly, made her way to the couch to collect all her PADDs. She grabbed her coffee cup and placed in the recycler.

Chakotay had made his way to the door, fixing his shirt and pants in the process. He waited for Kathryn to collect herself and when she gave them the go ahead, he opened the door.

Right outside the door stood a smiling, bright-eyed Cadet. Her smile slowly began to fade when she took in the slightly red lips of her Professor and the disheveled hair of the Admiral standing beside him. She realized she had obviously interrupted something.

"I can come back at a later time if you are busy, Professor Chakotay," she quietly said, her eyes moving from one to the other.

"Oh, no need. Office hours begin now. The Admiral was about to leave," Chakotay said. "Cadet Walker have you met Admiral Janeway?"

Kathryn fumbled with her PADDs as she outstretched one hand toward the girl. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

"It's an honor to meet you Admiral. I have heard so much about you from Professor Chakotay's lectures," she said, shaking Kathryn's hand with enthusiasm and grinning.

"I hope it's nothing bad," replied Kathryn, laughing.

"Oh no! Professor Chakotay speaks very highly of you."

Kathryn couldn't help but glance at Chakotay who was trying to suppress a smile. "Well I should be heading back to Headquarters. It was nice meeting you Cadet Walker and good-bye Professor Chakotay," said Kathryn, as she walked out the door.

Once the doors closed behind her and she was safely in the hallway, she let out a deep breath.

_Well, that was awkward._

=/\=

Kathryn and Chakotay scurried around the house making sure everything was perfectly in place. It was Christmas Eve and they expected their guests to arrive around 13:00 hours. They still had about an hour before people were supposed to arrive, but they still didn't want to leave anything to chance. They had decided to invite their former crew over, like Chakotay had suggested, to have a late lunch at their home. They chose not to have them over for dinner because they figured most would want to spend that time with their families instead.

Chakotay had taken over most of the party planning once he started his Winter break from the Academy. Kathryn had decided to let him deal with all the minor details, while she personally invited everyone. After speaking to over one hundred people in a couple of days, she began to think Chakotay had ended up with the easier job.

Most of the crew was delighted to speak with her. There were some she hadn't spoken to in almost a year because of their long-term assignments. There were also those somewhat odd conversations with some crewmembers who did not know about her relationship with Chakotay. They were elated to find out Chakotay and she had finally come to their senses. Well, they didn't actually say that since they still viewed her as their Captain, but she could tell from the looks on their faces.

After everyone had received their personal invitation, about a little over half of the crew had agreed to attend. When Chakotay and Kathryn realized they expected around eighty people at their home, they began to think his idea wasn't that brilliant. There wasn't going to be enough room to have a sit down meal. They figured they could just have a buffet style setting and everyone could just mingle while they ate. At least their backyard was large enough to accommodate extra tables and chairs.

There was still some time left before people were to arrive when Kathryn and Chakotay took a seat on their couch facing their fairly large Christmas tree. Kathryn was surprised one day when she came home from work to find a massive tree in their living room. They hadn't really discussed getting a tree for their home, not that she was against it, but she was just caught off guard by the size. Chakotay thought it would add a festive feel to their party. Kathryn couldn't help but giggle at his excitement. Then she thought about how this was the first they would be hosting an event as a couple and she didn't blame his enthusiasm.

"So, are you ready?" Kathryn asked, patting his leg.

"I think so. I'm actually somewhat nervous."

Kathryn laughed. "Why? You know these people."

"I know, but some of them I haven't seen in a long time and well, there's this..." He didn't finish his sentence as his hand gestured between the two of them.

"You mean us?"

"Yes."

"I know what you mean. I feel the same thing."

"I mean, we've been together for over a year now but never in the presence of so many people we know already. I just feel we are going to be under constant surveillance," Chakotay said, glancing at Kathryn.

"I have that feeling too. But I'm sure it will be all right. They did manage to compose themselves around us all those years on  _Voyager_. They can deal for a couple of hours."

"Well, I guess I should get all the kisses I want to give you out of my system before they arrive." Chakotay leaned into Kathryn and kissed her lightly on the lips. He moved back and looked at her and softly said, "I love you." He was about to lean in for another kiss when their door chimed.

"Why does that always happen," said Kathryn, rolling her eyes.

Chakotay chuckled as he stood up. He offered Kathryn his hand and they walked together to the door. They took a quick moment to themselves to take a deep breath.

"Good luck,  _Admiral._ "

"Good luck,  _Professor_."

=/\=

The sound of laughter echoed throughout the house. Everyone appeared to be having a good time as they ate, drank, and conversed with one another. Small groups of people were scattered throughout the house and Kathryn and Chakotay had not spent a single second together since people began to arrive.

Of course, Harry Kim was the first to arrive for the get together. He had brought them a bottle of wine, which they immediately opened. Harry was telling them about his promotion to Lieutenant when the next guests appeared. From then on it was an influx of people until everyone who agreed to show up was there.

Chakotay stood outside on the patio talking with Michael Ayala. Ayala was telling him how one of his sons had been accepted into the Academy for the next semester.

"Well I hope he eventually decides to take my course. I am a highly-rated and excellent Professor," said Chakotay, slyly.

Ayala couldn't help but laugh, while shaking his head, "Chakotay, I thought the cocky Maquis attitude was long gone."

"He likes to make an appearance every now and then. It must be the presence of so many former Maquis." Chakotay laughed. "No, but seriously, I would be honored to have your son in my class. Especially since his father was such integral part of what is being taught," Chakotay said, while patting Ayala on the back.

As both men continued their conversation, Chakotay couldn't help but glance inside the house. He noticed Kathryn sitting in a far corner speaking to Tuvok. Tuvok had initially declined their offer. He was going to be on Vulcan for several weeks and wouldn't return to Earth on time. Kathryn truly believed he declined the offer because he was discomforted by most social gatherings. However, his trip had been cut short and informed them a couple days prior to the festivities that he would, in fact, be able to attend. Kathryn was thrilled at the thought. She hadn't seen her long-time friend for far too long.

A couple of hours had gone by and several people had already left to attend previous engagements. By now most people had wandered to their backyard. Even if it was December, the weather was quite pleasant. Chakotay had managed to get away from everyone for a while and sat alone on the patio. He pondered what his life would have been like if Kathryn and he had not made amends many months ago.

He was lost in his thoughts when he noticed B'Elanna approaching him. She pulled up a chair right next to his and sat down.

"I thought you were talking to Kathryn?" he asked.

"I was, but I excused myself when Tuvok came over. I know they probably want to speak alone for a bit longer before he leaves. Kathryn was telling me they don't see each other a lot."

Chakotay looked away from B'Elanna and glanced over at Kathryn. The friends must have been having a very deep conversation based on Kathryn's furrowed brows. He returned his attention to B'Elanna. "They don't. We actually don't see any of the former crew that much. It's somewhat hard with everyone all over the place."

"Tell me about it. You know, sometimes I miss our days on  _Voyager_. Don't get me wrong, I love being away from the constant hazards of the Delta Quadrant, but I just miss the people," B'Elanna sighed. "Even Vorik. He wasn't able to attend?"

"No. He's on a deep space mission and won't be back for another two months."

"Oh," said B'Elanna.

"It's hard to believe we've been back for about a year and a half and my mind tends to wander to  _Voyager_  a lot. I mean, it was seven years of our lives, I guess it's somewhat hard to ignore."

B'Elanna continued to talk to Chakotay but he didn't hear a word she said. He was distracted by the sound of Kathryn's laugh. He loved to see her laugh.

"Geez, Old Man, get control of yourself," B'Elanna said, as she playfully punched him on the arm.

"What?!" Chakotay said, not realizing she was talking to him until he felt her fist's impact.

B'Elanna looked at him with a crooked smile. "You really love her, don't you?"

"Every day a little more," Chakotay replied, smiling back at her.

"I'm so glad you two finally came to. Took you long enough. How did you manage while on  _Voyager_? It was obvious both of you had a thing for each other."

"I guess we just focused on our duties and protocols."

"Ya, ya, duties and protocols," she muttered, sarcastically.

They both sat in silence observing the rest of the guests, until B'Elanna spoke again.

"So, you two have been together for what? A year? Do you have any plans for the future? Or are you just planning to live together just the two of you for the rest of your lives?"

Chakotay laughed. "I missed how blunt you are, B'Elanna."

"Don't evade my question!"

Chakotay sighed. "Well, if you are referring to children, we have talked about it. It's something we both want, but at the same time aren't sure we can handle at the moment. We are just very busy most of the time. But with so many advancements in medical technology we still have many years before children are no longer an option."

"Well, if you ever want to practice, you can borrow Miral for a day. Or a week. Or a year."

Chakotay chuckled. "You aren't exactly convincing me having kids is a good idea."

"I'm only joking. Like everything in life, there are ups and downs. But with her it's mostly ups. Honestly, she is the best thing that has happened to me, besides Tom, and I wouldn't change it for the world."

As she finished speaking, they noticed Kathryn approaching them.

"Why are you two hiding over here?" Kathryn asked, raising her eyebrows.

"Secret Maquis stuff. You don't need to know," Chakotay replied.

Kathryn laughed. "Well if you are done with the secrecy, I think we should say a toast before everyone else leaves."

"Sounds good."

Chakotay and B'Elanna stood up from their chairs. She walked over to Tom who was still holding a now sleeping Miral. Chakotay followed Kathryn into the house to get the bottles of champagne. They returned outside, began to fill some glasses, and passed them out to their guests. Kathryn raised her glass when everyone had their own.

"I want to thank everyone for attending today. I know it can be difficult around this time of year, but Chakotay and I really appreciate it. I know we no longer see each other on a daily basis, but I feel each and everyone of you is part of my family. You put your lives on the line countless of times while on  _Voyager,_  and that is something that I can never repay you for. I want to wish everyone a wonderful Holiday season and once again, thank you for everything." She took a sip from her glass and everyone followed suit.

Before anyone else could say anything, Chakotay cleared his throat and said, "As we all know, a crew is only as strong as its captain. In our case, we were lucky enough to have a dedicated, intelligent, albeit occasionally reckless, one." He smiled at Kathryn, who only pursed her lips, while trying to suppress a laugh. "If it weren't for Kathryn's constant determination and self-sacrifice, we would not be where we are today. Thank you, Kathryn, for being you."

He raised his glass, but instead of taking a sip, he reached over, wrapped his arm around her waist, pulled her close to him, and kissed her on the lips. Everyone in attendance clapped and cheered at Chakotay's gesture.

When they finally pulled apart, Kathryn's face was red. She lowered her head slightly to hide her giant grin. Her shoulders moved slightly up and down as she tried to hold in her nervous laughter. Chakotay wasn't sure what him do what he did, but he just felt the need to do so. And based on the crowd's response, they quite enjoyed it as well.

Kathryn smiled at him as she wrapped her arm around his waist. She whispered, "I love you," only enough for him to hear and gave him a gentle hug, while placing her cheek against his chest.

Chakotay whispered, "I love you too."

=/\=

It had been several hours since all the guests had left. Empty glasses and plates were scattered all over the house and the backyard. Chakotay and Kathryn sat curled up on the couch going over the day's events.

"I'm really glad we did this. I had a wonderful time," she said.

"Me too. It was great to see so many people again. I didn't realize how much I missed them until today."

"I'm just sorry not everyone was able to attend. But if they had, we would not have been able to fit everyone here."

Kathryn laughed, "I know. It was already a packed house as it is. We should plan something else for the summer. Hopefully more people can show up. We would just need to find another location."

"I'm sure we can find somewhere to go. Or maybe we just need to buy a larger house!"

They both laughed. They sat in silence for a while, their fingers intertwined with the other's.

"Too bad Sekaya wasn't able to come today. It's somewhat ridiculous I have yet to meet her in person."

"Well, that's what happens when you are almost nine months pregnant."

"Very true," Kathryn responded, stifling a yawn.

"Maybe we should go to bed. We can clean up tomorrow before heading over to your mom's. What time do we have to be there?"

"Noon," she yawned.

"I can't wait to see your nephews. I need to tell them they've been promoted from Ensigns to Lieutenants."

Kathryn giggled. "They were promoted faster than Harry!"

They both laughed. After a moment Chakotay noticed Kathryn nodding off.

"Why don't you go to bed? I'll meet you in a bit. There's something I need to do beforehand."

"What do you need to do?" she asked, standing from the couch and slowly making her way to the stairs.

"Can I not have any secrets?"

"No. Luckily for you I'm too tired to pry. I'll meet you upstairs," she said, walking up the stairs.

Chakotay made sure she was upstairs before he made his move. He walked toward the kitchen and carefully opened a top cabinet. He reached in and pulled out a small jewelry box. He placed it inside his pants pocket and closed the door.

A sudden rush of excitement and nervousness took over his body as he made his way up the stairs. In the morning, once they woke up, he planned on asking Kathryn to marry him. He had wanted to ask her for a long time but never found the right opportunity. Or maybe he just made excuses out of fear.

When he walked into the bedroom, Kathryn was in their bathroom. He quickly removed the box from his pocket and placed it in his nightstand drawer. He changed into his pajamas and waited for Kathryn before he got into bed.

After a couple of minutes they were both snuggled up against one another under the blankets. Kathryn's eyes were slowly closing.

He kissed her lightly on the cheek and said, "Good night, Kathryn"

She barely whispered, "Good night," before she closed her eyes and fell asleep.

He placed another gentle kiss on her cheek and closed his eyes.

Tomorrow was going to be the beginning of a new chapter in their lives.


	13. Epilogue

**One Year Later**

"How about Simon?"

"Um…no," replied Chakotay.

"Benjamin? Ben for short?"

"That's a bit better. But still not loving it."

"Hmmm…Thomas?"

"That's ok."

"Well, do you have any suggestions?" asked Kathryn, quite frustrated by now.

Kathryn and Chakotay sat on their couch on Christmas morning. They had been playing the name game for the past thirty minutes and they couldn't agree on anything.

"Maybe we can just wait to get to know his personality before naming him," said Chakotay, reaching over and placing his hand on Kathryn's.

"We could. But do you really think that's going to help?"

Chakotay laughed. "Probably not."

"I'm stuck."

"What about Dante?"

Kathryn scrunched her face. "As much as I like literary references, I'm going to have to say no to that suggestion."

"Neelix!"

"Oh, now you are just being daft. And as a rule of thumb, let's avoid any name that reminds us of any of our former crew."

Chakotay laughed again. "Agreed."

"This is a lot harder than I thought it would be," she said, furrowing her brow, while glancing at Chakotay.

"Maybe we are forcing it right now. What if we focus our minds on something else? Some name is bound to sound appealing eventually."

"You're right. You're so intelligent. I guess that's why I agreed to marry you," Kathryn replied, with a smirk.

"After six months of marriage, I'm barely finding out you just married me for my intelligence," Chakotay replied, feigning anger.

"Yes. Your intelligence and your ability to make a decent cup of coffee. That is all. Nothing else."

"Oh you are just mocking me now," Chakotay said, as he pulled her closer to him and kissed her on the lips.

They continued to kiss as he gently moved her onto her back while he maneuvered his body on top of hers, making every effort not to put too much weight on her.

"I love you," she said, as she placed both hands on his cheeks, grasping his face lightly. "I love you for everything you do for me. I love your compassion, your understanding, your ability to make me laugh. I love everything about you."

"I love you too. Every day I think it's impossible to love you more, yet every day I'm proven wrong. I'm so glad you are my wife."

As Chakotay was about to lean down to kiss Kathryn again, a raspy tongue interfered, licking his face, then hers, with enthusiasm. They both couldn't help but laugh.

"We've only had him for a couple of hours and he's already affecting our love life," said Kathryn, still laughing.

They both sat up on the couch and looked at the chocolate colored Labrador staring at them with excitement, his tongue hanging out of his mouth. The three-month- old puppy had been Kathryn's gift to Chakotay this Christmas. They had talked about getting a dog in the past but never actually went through with it. She figured it would be a perfect time to do so.

"Maybe we should name him Trouble. Seems fitting," said Chakotay, petting the puppy on the head and then lifting him onto the couch. "I think he might be hungry. Let me get him some food. Do you want anything?"

"How 'bout a delicious cup of joe," responded Kathryn, as the puppy made himself comfortable on her lap.

As soon as the words left her mouth, a wide-eyed look covered Kathryn's face. She turned to look at Chakotay and noticed the same expression on his. They both knew the other was thinking the same thing.

"Let's name him Joe," they said in unison, grinning.

 

[The End]


End file.
